Saturday 5/28, In the morning I kept waking up and just thinking and staring at the ceiling, then he woke up and aske me how I was feeling, and I was like "Ehh, ok, I don't know" then he was like "What's going on?" it was hard to tell him, but I did. I told him that I felt like I wasn't good enough for him and that his friends must think that too cause everyone seems to have their critical thing to say about me. Anyway, we talked a whole bunch and he told me not to worry and that Mildred's just a bitch and not that good of a friend so I don't need to worry. He told me why he likes me and that made me feel better, and then finally we got out of bed and I checked my phone and Kristel wanted to put our hanging out until later, so I drove home and ate some lunch and visited with Mom, and she got a new car, Mercedes again, so I drove that around the block and it's pretty nice, but then Kristel wanted to meet for dinner instead of sunbathing cause she's dealing with roommate drama and had a ton of shit to do, so I came home and showered and took a little nap and watched some SatC and then called Kristel around 6:20 and I headed over. I got there and the gate wouldn't open, but K came down and then we went up and I chatted with her parents a little and helped take some stuff down to their car, then they left and Kristel took a shower and I watched What Not to Wear and looked at a Pottery Barn catalog, then we walked across the street to the Thai place and I told her about the incident the night before...she had plenty to say (she's mouthy and unhappy) and we talked all the way through dinner. After that, we went to Starbucks so I could get my customary Chocolate Chip cookie, then we sat in her apt and talked some more and I got some ice for my bee sting. It was like 9:30 so I left to go meet B at Jason's house, and when I got there they were playing a game and then broke out the Outburst and I just watched, cause we all know I don't play em...then we went home at like 12:30 and went to bed...

I'll write more later...at this point I'm sick of it.

Friday 5/27, I was feeling kind of down, but I was going to go to B's house so I was excited about that, but anyway, I got off of work an hour early and came home and showered I think...I just watched a whole bunch of SatC and ate some veggies and rice for dinner. I think the process of just lying around and not doing anything all evening made my "weird" mood a little worse. So anyway...then B called and said that he wanted to go out and that if I wanted to too, I could come out...which I didn't really want to do, but I wanted to see him so I said I would come over. So I drove over and he told me that he was kind of in still a bad mood from before and that he wasn't quite over it, which was weird cause that's how I was feeling, but I didn't want to be like "Oh yeah, I'm in a weird mood too" cause that looks obvious or something...but I wrote a blog earlier in the day so there's my proof that I was not feeling good. Then I told him, and we sat on his bed and just talked for a long time and he said that I made him feel better cause we talked about relationships and my great realization (Shit, that's what I was going to talk to Kristel about...this will act as a reminder) and some other stuff, but I don't remember...anyway, we talked forever, and then he thought that we should probably find his phone cause people were going to be calling him to make plans. So we got ready and went out to his car and he had some missed calls, but when he tried to return them no one was answering, so we decided to go to Greenlake and walk around and talk...so we get there and we start walking around but then this biker told us a bike race was going to be coming through, so we detoured through a field and then when we hit the basketball court Mildred called. So they're talking and I hear him saying poncho and shawl and that they would have to look something up in the dictionary, but then I stopped paying attention. So when he gets off the phone, he's like "Yeah, um, Mildred doesn't like your purple shawl" and I was like "...What?" then he says that he got a text message from her earlier and didn't know what it meant and showed it to me, it said "lilac poncho? ah, sick!" So I guess those were the first words out of her mouth on the phone...I guess it didn't sit well with her. Anyway, then I'm like, how does she even KNOW I have one...I've never met her, and I've only worn it twice, once to Bremerton for his Grandma's birthday and the other time to Diana's birthday party, but I left it in the car cause B said it didn't really go with my outfit...so I guess it didn't sit well with him either. ANYWAY, so then I'm trying to figure out how she even knows...and then I'm getting pissed cause she doesn't even know me and she's talking shit. Then B's like "That's really weird, I wonder how she even knows" and I just was like "what the fuck ever" what a bitch. So then we walk back to the car and go to the store cause B's hungry, but they're closing so we go back to the one by his house pick up food and go home. I get ready for bed, he makes his food and then we go to bed. He fell asleep right away but I couldn't sleep right away and couldn't stop thinking about how I felt like I was being judged by all of his friends...so then I start crying, but my chest was convulsing cause I was trying to be quiet, so I had to try not to...and finally fell asleep.