Tuesday 10/2, I woke up first and was watching tv in the living room and eating some breakfast when the phone rang and it was one of the guys from the front desk asking when we wanted our tour but I told him K was still sleeping and I couldn’t make any decisions without her. He said he would call back so we vowed to not answer the phone. I woke K up and told her and pretty soon we were moving. We headed into Georgetown to do some shopping and noticed 2 cruise ships in the bay – damn! We parked anyway and went to the craft market where we admired the goods and I bought a turtle soap dish from Lee (“like Bruce Lee, but without the karate”). He approached us after chatting a while and asked if we would want to go on his brother’s boat to Sting Ray City and he would give us his # since asking for ours would be “awkward”. We got his info then met his little friend and he told us where to go to access 7 Mile Beach and some beachside food. We continued walking and looking in shops and stopped in the Parfumerie where we perused for a long time and it was making my nose go crazy. I suggested K try Jean Paul Gaultier’s “Classique” limited edition summer fragrance and it ended up being both of our favorites and she ended up buying it. We continued walking and stopped so Kassie could get a smoothie, walked some more then turned around and headed back to the car. We drove north to the Grape Vine where Lee told us there were multiple places to find beach access. We found one, parked and walked down the beach to be away from the other people. We jumped in the water and swam around for a while and talked about sex techniques and laughed because we couldn’t see each other’s pelvises. We ended up back on our towels and laid there for maybe 45 minutes then packed up because I was hungry. We brushed ourselves off in the parking lot then took off for the next public beach down. We went to get out of the car but my shoes weren’t there, and I instantly realized they were probably back at the park so we drove back and there they were so I had K drive up to them so I didn’t even have to get out. I picked them up and exclaimed that it looked like someone ran over them, then realized it was probably her and we sat there laughing for a minute. Back down to the other beach for some lunch at Calico Jack’s. We asked the waitress if she knew Phil J from Whistler but she didn’t. Lunch was decent but overpriced. K went back the car to get the towels but was gone so long I headed down and of course some island fellow had intercepted her. I grabbed my stuff and headed down to the beach…with Michael in tow. We chatted with him for a while but I just wasn’t interested (nutty nutty cream!) so I went to get in the water and K came too so M told us not to leave and that he’d be back. We took that opportunity to snap some pics and laugh and cover ourselves with sand. M came back with his cousin Junior, who had said hello to me earlier while we were eating but I thought he worked there so…yeah…Junior wouldn’t stop staring at my boobs and was an interesting character. We made him guess our ages and who was older (like everyone we met) and he was wrong. Everything was super exaggerated like about Kali’s and everything on E, his pound of weed a day habit and “dem Beatle boys”. We all talked for a long time and M told K to give him her contact info so we could “receive” him when he comes to Seattle. Um, no. K, M and me all got in and were swimming around and J was left out so of course he had to get in on the fun. We got out and started to leave and J said something into K’s ear that he was a freak or something and K told him she didn’t appreciate and that he wouldn’t be whispering anything else in her ear. We told them we would be checking out Next Level that evening and that maybe we’d see them there. But hoped we wouldn’t. We went to the English bakery in Georgetown but it was closed and K almost ran over this old lady like 3 times. We went to Café del Sol by the movie theater and both got lemon bars. This guy was dancing in line and winked at me when I looked at him then every time we glanced over he would like smirk and K called him my bf. His friend was way cuter. Back at home we hung out, showered and moisturized while watching tv. We were going to go out to dinner and dancing and had picked Chicken Chicken but when we pulled up it was more fast foody for what we were dressed for so we got back in the car and went to Ragazzi and all eyes were on us when we walked in then the hostess felt K’s butt because she loved her pants. We were served some delicious bread and our meals were up in no time. I got basil and pesto gnocchi and K got a delicious rosemary chicken with potato and goat cheese pizza. We ate off each other’s plates and finished about ½ and had our Italian waiter box up the rest. We asked him q’s about how he ended up in GC. He took some pics of us then we left. I quickly realized we left the food but K refused to turn around. We went down to the public beach so K could, you know, and I studied the map then we took off down the strip. We parked by Aqua Bar and Next Level since they’re right next to each other and went into AB since it appeared there were a TON of guys in there, and oh were there ever. Some cute, some not, but it was nice to have those kinds of odds anyway. We sat down so we had a view of the place, ordered waters and asked to hear the desserts. I ordered the peach and blueberry cobbler and K ordered the chocolate brownie and ic. Mine was really good but I didn’t like K’s. We sat and talked since it was still a bit early to head to the night club. I saw a group of 3 guys come in and K was like “No. No. No.” (a no for each one) especially since the last guy was like 5’5”. Of course they sat at the next table over, but we didn’t pay attention because we were watching the Ultimate Fighting match on the 2 big screen tvs. The short guy comes over and asks us about it and if we’re into it. He’s not cute at all and is old, well I’d guess 38 at LEAST. We tell him to guess who’s older but he wouldn’t and gets kind of snarky when K takes the piss because he “didn’t know where CA is”. I just wanted him to go away. His being British wasn’t even helping. His 2 friends came over to say they were ready for more drinks or to go or something and we said we were going so we said bye or whatever and left. The bouncer said we were too hot to pay a cover so we went in and it…was empty. There were seriously about 9 people there including the bartender and inside bouncer. We turned around pretty quickly and headed out just as the British guys were coming in so we went back in and since a good song came on, hit the dance floor and started getting down. He played a couple JT hits so we were really into those and got this other girl on the floor too. We were dancing and laughing so hard that I totally pulled something in my neck or gave myself whiplash or something. K got up on the stripper pole and started working it and I could tell all dem boys were watching. The short one came out and tried to dance or touch while she was on it and she pushed him away with her foot on his chest, Grease style. I laughed so hard. I bad song came on so we went to stand by the guys and they had ordered waters for us and we started chatting. I was talking to the Scotsman and K to the short one and a little to the brown haired one (who was def the cutest). I found out he lives on the island and is an architect and told us the biggest house on the island is a 45,000 square foot mansion. Shit bitch! I think we danced a few more, hit the bathroom and cracked up about K kicking that guy in the chest, then told them we were leaving and took off. It was pouring by the time we got out there so we rushed home, avoided puddles in the parking lot, but both nailed one and headed into our room. It was after 1:00 I think and we pretty much hit the sack.

Monday 10/1, Housekeeping woke me up at 10 which was good because it was time. I ate some breakfast and we got ready and headed out toward the N. Side. We stopped at Willie’s for fresh mango, banana and papaya fruit smoothies and back on the road we kept ourselves occupied gabbing and listening to Electrelane. We tried the public beach on the N. Side but it wasn’t as good so we headed down to the Rum Point beach and there were way fewer people than the day before. We snagged front row seats again and started tanning. I went for a swim while K slept but since it wasn’t all that nice we only stayed about 2 hours then left for “Over the Edge” café for a late lunch. We both got the New Orleans chicken and it was good but no Kali’s chicken. After lunch we decided to circle the East Side and saw some completely insane houses but it was otherwise a fairly uneventful drive. Right as we turned into our complex we spotted this guy in diving gear or something in the bushes peeing and Kassie honked and yelled “I can see it!” which we laughed about for a good 10 minutes. We went home and showered and ended up watching tv for the rest of the night, like Dancing with the Stars and more E than I cared for and read GC mags. I fell asleep and K stayed up watching First 48 or something.

Sunday 9/30, I woke up around 10 and went out on the deck to update this and listened to some Southerners swear up a storm on the course. I ate some cereal then started waking K up since it was almost 11. She woke up pretty easily and started getting ready. We both ended up on the deck again doing our respective things then hit the road to check out the East and North parts of the island. We went into Georgetown to try and find the fruit stand and when they say everything closes on Sundays they meant it. There was like nothing open, including any of the markets. We continued on hoping to find something and finally settled for Haagen Dasz and shared a banana split. Eventually came to the Lighthouse and had a small lunch of salads and garlic bread. We were going to roll out but I had to use the bathroom and discovered I started my period. All over the inside of my brand new white and gold bikini bottoms. Mad was I. We finally made it up to Rum Point and stopped at what Harry told us was a good beach. It was a wee touristy and busy for our taste but we went into the gift shop anyway to see if they had tampons, they did and I picked up postcards. K bought a new swimsuit and we headed to the beach. We grabbed 2 chairs right by the water in the sun. We were both so hot so we jumped in the water and it was so insanely warm. We laid in the sun and I wrote more while K fell asleep. We spotted this hot guy a few chairs down that reminded me of HI Matt. I went in the water again and floated around for a while then back up. We stayed for a few hours talking about Cate Blanchett, clothes, the hot guy and trying to figure out his accent (my guess: Australian). We went for one last swim, dried off for about ½ hour then packed up and headed home. It was about 5:45 and we made it fine and just as the sun was going down. I showered and we busted out the brie and baguette, then trail mix and Wheat Thins. We started watching “Family Jewels” and ended up watching it until 2am.

Saturday 9/29, We landed right at 5:30 and I asked my seat mate if the bottle of Baileys on the floor was his and when he said no I said in a sing song-y voice “I bet I know whose it is!” and he laughed. The Magnum PI story cracked us both up. The terminal was freezing just like I remembered so I stopped at Starbucks for a hot chocolate, waved bye to my friend and started toward Kassie’s gate in the E concourse from A. I walked around for a while scoping things out then sat at her gate, totally empty and a little eerie, and watched the news. She called when she landed but after 5 minutes when no one was deplaning I walked all the way back to the monitors to check I had the right gate, I did, and on my way back K texted that they couldn’t get the door open. After she deplaned we walked around and finally settled with some food items and to stay warm. I looked all over for that strawberry parfait but couldn’t find it. We had a 3 hour layover and spent most of it talking about I and S and finances. We finally headed to our gate and sat in the sun waiting until it was our turn to board. We were sitting by ourselves and both ended up falling asleep. She did for most of the 2 hour flight and me for just a bit of it. The luggage, customs and immigration were a breeze so we got to the rental car place quickly and before a large line could form. We waited a good ½ hour anyway but ended up with not an Atos (like Saint Martin) but a Toyota Yaris (not like the US version) that was so cute and had a cd player. The steering wheel was on the other side because the Cayman Islands are a British dependency so we both knew that would present a challenge. The directions to the resort were piss poor but we managed to find it by process of elimination. We got all checked in and found our condo and it was so much nicer than the one in SM. The view was pretty good too except there was always a group of people on the putting green so we heard lots of interesting conversations. We hung in the room and unpacked, I showered in the cold water then took off to find something to eat and get our bearings. We spotted this café / coffee shop and headed toward it but Kassie drove into a roundabout the wrong way and instantly I was like “Is this right?! Is this right?!” and she was like “SHIT!” and compensated quickly. We were both totally frazzled. She was like “I should have known it was wrong, it felt too natural” as we made it to the café. We shared a jerk chicken and mango crepe and a tomato, mozzarella and basil crepe and both were really good. We packed up and went to the store where we saw the “Nice Papayas” guys again, picked up some bread, cheese, breakfast stuff and a few other items. We unloaded at home and started flipping through the GC tourist info. I got really sleepy and cold so I headed in to read in bed and soon fell asleep. K climbed in too and about 2 hours later I woke up, walked around a little and felt really refreshed. I turned the tv on and kept paging through the materials. I asked K what she wanted to do and she said sleep so I let her for a little while longer but then I started getting hungry so I slowly woke her up and told her I didn’t think we should stay in. I turned on some AWFUL “Pick Up Artist” show as a way to continue waking her up and eventually she did. That dumb show was over so we got ready, looked at various restaurants in our materials, took some hilarious pictures with the Grand Caymanian iguana, asked Harry for some market and restaurant recommendations and headed out to our desired destination. It was called Cimboco and it was in this kind of strip mall with lots of hooligans bumping their stereo systems. We sat outside anyway, because the AC inside was freezing. We had a really good bruschetta for starters then shared a light and simple pasta with olive oil, feta, tomatoes and basil. For dessert we split a cream cheese brownie with ice cream and almost died because it was so good. We decided to explore the N. Side of that part of the island because we didn’t want to go home yet. We found the turtle farm and some ghetto areas but also like one of the biggest beach houses I’ve ever seen. We found our way back without incident and started to get the hang of the map, roads and driving (“long right, short left!”). I continued to read up on GC and turned on SNL and it was finally a new one and some of it was really funny. K fell asleep while I was getting ready for bed and eventually I turned in as well. In the middle of the night she woke up complaining of a splitting headache so I told her she was probably dehydrated and gave her some Ibuprofen. She laid back down but within minutes was in the bathroom puking and apologizing to me. I didn’t know what to do so I just sat up in bed and waited for her to come back. She felt better but still had an awful headache and was moaning. I told her she should smoke a J but she said that never helps her with headaches and fell back asleep pretty easily.