Thursday 4/30, Castor and I took a mile walk after work at the park then home. I started on a bunch of chores (bathrooms, laundry, vacuuming) in anticipation of possibly getting my house finished. I called the carpet guy (for the bedrooms) and the paint guy (for the ceilings and one wall in my room) and am eager for a response. I talked to Eric as I was finishing my dinner and we talked for a bit. Dad and Mom called and I told them about the house and Dad thinks I should do it but not sell my place; rent it and he'll front me the money down for the new house and I pay him back when the market is up and I sell my place. Interesting proposition, to say the least. I sent them the link and they both like it, but think it doesn't need any changes! Eek. It got all kinds of wheels turning and I'm going to try and refinance my current mortgage anyway. I called Eric when I took Castor out and told him and he's all for it and thinks I have nothing to lose. I went back in and watched Southland and looked at pictures of mid-century modern houses for inspiration until like 11:30. I was too excited to sleep so I turned my light back on and read for a while then was out. Probably well after midnight.

Wednesday 4/29, I couldn't stop thinking about that house all day and looking at the pictures so I crunched some numbers and realized I could totally swing buying it, if I could even sell my condo. I mapped it and planned to go see it after work with Eric. When I got home he was busy in the kitchen prepping dinner (fajita / taco things). He changed and off we went. It took us a few minutes to find it and when we did the front yard was much smaller than the picture. Eric grabbed a flier and I took in as much as I could from the street. We went on our way talking about it and Eric’s all excited at the prospect and said he'd take care of the yard and asked me what my budget for a mower is. I told him $50, he was thinking more in the $1,200 range. Don't think so. Anyway, we went to the dog park and let Castor smell all the dogs’ butts and get knocked around by a little fox looking dog. We didn't stay long, just enough for him to get his rocks off. We went to the store so Eric could get his daily watermelon then home where he got dinner ready and I paid my bills and tried to figure out what the hell my mortgage company did to my principal total. I talked to Susan and planned to hit the Rack soon after work. Dinner was served and it was sooo good. I ate three. Some of the most delicious beef (marinated flank steak) I've had in a long time, orange peppers and onion, avo, lettuce, tomatoes and lime. Mmm. I'm looking forward to leftovers. We watched Scrubs then the end of ANTM and Eric thought it was ridiculous. I cleaned things up then took Castor out and did some stretching and called Kay-See to talk Belize, the Wine Awrds and possible hiking on Sunday. Went upstairs, showered and got into bed to a waiting Eric. We talked and snuggled and half watched the news. Lights out by 10:30.

Tuesday 4/28, I had a sex dream about Chris Parnell (it was good) then Gary took me to an Amy Winehouse show at Golden Gardens. Weird. Eric beat me home and was all excited to see me when I got there. I told him I thought we should do my workout video and he had had the same idea but first wanted to show me his ex on facebook. She was cute. Then I showed him the mid-century modern house I found in Bellevue that I want. He liked it. We got down to the video and he liked it and we both were sweating by the end of it. He was like "Now don't you feel like you could go run three miles?!" and he was serious. I was like "Um, no. I feel like it's time for dinner" so we talked in the shower and got ready and went to the store. I was making dinner for once. At home I prepped and had the food in the oven in no time. At 8 it was ready and BL was on so we watched that. Eric stayed with me for about 45 minutes then went up to watch the game. At 9:30 I went up and he was asleep. I took the dog out and climbed into bed. I read some AD before bed.

Monday 4/27, I took Castor to the park after work and we did a mile. At home I made dinner for us and did a few things around the house before settling in to watch GG. Talked to Eric at some point, he thought he might come up on Tuesday. Went to bed semi-early.

Sunday 4/26, Eric was up way early so I went back to sleep then I started hearing the rest of the crew up so I thought I should get up and looked at the time. 7:50. Are you kidding me? I got up anyway. C and Eric were getting ready to go for a run and S and I stayed behind and read and half watched tv in the living room. They came back with tales of a cramp-y ankle and a horse that acted like a dog. Eric got down to making breakfast and I hopped in the shower and was having a great time in there solving the pattern of the tiles. When I got out breakfast was being served and we were having gluten free pancakes (these were just as good if not better than the real thing), bacon and fruit. It was a breakfast for champions. I cleaned up and everyone got ready and soon we were out the door headed to University Place to some crazy park and golf course. There was a 2+ mile loop up and down, through the woods and through the golf course so we set out. The sun was out and it was really warm. Soon we were all sweating and C and I had to go to the bathroom. We booked it and she ran. I drank a ton of water and then we set out to find the boys. Eric let Castor go and he ran all the way to me in the middle of the field. We walked back to the drinking fountains and the boys all had some water. We continued walking up the huge hill. We stood at the top looking down into the old gravel pit and thought how cool it would be if they had concerts there. Back at the car we all loaded in and off we went for more sightseeing and ended up going through the base and couldn't believe all the equipment there and the millions upon millions of dollars just sitting there. Nuts. We went back to Eric's where we all foraged for lunch and I had a half sandwich, finished off the chips, yogurt then a cup o gold. We talked at the table then C & S took off. I stuck around and Eric and I were both tired so we both took a little nap in the living room and talked and watched a little tv and he made dinner. It was a ground turkey pasta tomato thing and it was good. It was about 7:30 so I packed up the car and headed home. I made really good time and was to the store by 8:05. Picked up some groceries and headed home. Eric called to make sure I made it ok and I watched my shows then went to bed.

Saturday 4/25, I woke up before 7 and cursed and managed to fall back asleep. I rewoke at 8:15 and got up and got ready and hit the road with Castor to Walgreens to pick up a card for Eric's two year anniversary and also got Castor a little hedgehog booda toy. Next was the bank, but it was closed. Back at Eric's I took a shower and washed my hair and waited for him to arrive. He did, with three donuts from Pau's in tow, mmmm. I love him. I ate two of them then told Eric I was going back to the bank (with a stomach ache, no less). When I got back Chrystol and Schuyler had just arrived so we said our hellos and planned our day. We got going right away to Olympia and headed straight to the park, and as we arrived I realized it was the same one where Hakim and Carmen had their day before the wedding bbq. We hiked down to the water with gloves and tools and found the group (People for PS) and the lead guy showed us what the plan was and off we went. Chrystol and I were a team for a good part of it and pulled up a lot of ivy roots. Eric and S were more surface workers. I helped save a tree by cutting all the ivy off. We laughed a lot and talked about plans and mostly it was fun. Don't tell Eric, otherwise he'll get a big head about it. Toward the end I spotted a reddish salamander or newt and the guy said it's a rare one then he tried to make it sound like I'd stepped on it or something. We helped haul all the debris out (and garbage, like shoes and socks and lots of bottles) and left it on the beach for the parks dept people. We hiked back up and were all hungry. We got out of there and went to the farmer's market where I spotted what I wanted right away: Indian. I got some veggie curry and sat and waited for the rest of the crew to decide on their lunch. Some bluegrass-y band played and we quickly wrapped it up and perused the market. I got a big chocolate chip cookie then an apple. We went over to the water to look at all the boats and I picked the one I wanted with the deck spiral staircase that everyone thought was hideous. We wandered downtown but Eric had to move the car so the three of us continued walking and looking around. The streets were all closed for the art walk and parade and celebration and all that. Chrystol and I ducked into many shops and S stayed outside. We ended up at Drees again and I got a peek at the price of that marble lamp ($1,399) and Chrystol guessed correctly. We looked at the cards for a long time and I got a different one for Eric then we looked at wedding cards for Susan and I got a mother's day card - only one. Eric finally arrived as we were finishing up so we walked around for a long time looking at the street chalk drawings and Chrystol wrote "Eric <3s Karrah" and I looked over to see him writing my initials, which was adorable. We ended up in the toy store looking at the Mobil toys and picking out our favorites and couldn't believe how thorough the kits were. The parade was going to start soon but first a detour to the tea shop then out to our spot. It was a really cool parade and had water, air and land themed groups. There were some crazy setups. Chrystol used to compete in floats so she pointed out the good ones. That lasted a good 45 minutes then we walked back to the car and started our drive back. Some girl almost pulled out in front of Eric in her, like, Toyota Celica and Schuyler yelled “Jesus! Are you trying to fucking kill yourself?!” It’s probably the most animated I’ve ever seen him. We couldn’t stop laughing afterward and kept repeating it. We let Castor out and he was beside himself. We hopped back in the car to go to the store and I picked up hotdogs, buns, sea salt and vinegar chips and a yogurt. Back at home C and I let the boys handle dinner and sat in the living room and out in the backyard with Castor and read magazines. I got the card out and we all sneakily signed it and both C & S put my message to shame. After we finished dinner I got the stuff out and he was very appreciative. We ended up watching tv and looking at profiles online and I had the other coconut chocolate bar. We all started falling asleep by 11 so we got ready for bed and crashed out by 11:30.

Friday 4/24, Peggy forgot something so at 3 she asked me to drive it to the RC and drop it off then I could be done for the day. I did that and was home before 4 so I gathered all my stuff and Eric called right as I was doing that and I told him I would be heading down via the back hwys. I took off at 4:07 and though I hit some traffic and stuff I made it by 5:12, which was way better than the hour and 45 minutes it took me last time I left at 4 and went down 5. He was lawn mowin when I arrived so I let Castor out and we talked and he ran around and it was hilarious. I read magazines on the back steps and watched Castor lounge. I feel really sorry for the little dog next door because he's just chained up at the back of the yard and no one ever plays with him. He cries when we're out playing and watches us the whole time. The only interaction I've seen is when they come out to put his food on the ground and walk away. He plays ball with himself and watches us longingly when we’re in the yard. I want to report them. It's no life for a dog; they're pack animals and this one's chained at the back of the yard with no pack or attention. Anyway, Eric was done around 7 so he showered and we went down by PLU to a pizza place for dinner. There was some very interesting people watching. We both got Calzones and checked out the cute redhead chef and girly boy at a nearby table. At home we watched tv, I had a coconut chocolate bar and we looked at stuff online. We were both tired so we went to bed early, like 10.

Thursday 4/23, Castor and I took a long walk after work on the trail and talked to Susan about plans for her big day and Castor's new jacket. Sos beeped in so I jumped off to talk to her and we chatted for a while and I begged her and Jake to come down to Tacoma this weekend, but Jake seems vehemently opposed so what more can I do? We hung up as I got back to the car and took off for home. I did some house-y things when I got home and had to cut all the wool carpet out of my vacuum which took forever. Ate dinner and talked to Eric briefly about his day then called Susan back and talked about our weekends and reading past blog entries and how funny she is. I watched tv upstairs and Eric called me back and we chatted until 9:15. I took Castor out and showered and got ready for bed and did some more blog reading until Southland came on then to bed.

Wednesday 4/22, Castor and I went to the park after work and walked around for a long time and I talked to Lish about the new guy she's seeing and the old one and Kassie's big birthday surprise. At home Kass beeped in and Sky surprised her and took her to LA and they were in some boutique and Ryan Adams and Mandy Moore were in there, just the four of them, and Ryan and Sky started talking and Sky recommended some restaurant to them and Ryan was appreciative then they peace-d out. This amused me. I called Lish back and told her and soon got off the phone because my dinner was almost ready. Castor shared my broccoli and carrots with me. Watched tv, read lots of my blog (1/08 - 3/08) and talked to Eric and our plans, which apparently include volunteering on Saturday with Schuyler and Chrystol. Went to bed by 11.

Tuesday 4/21, Returned the other collar because it was too small; not meant to be. Castor and I went to the park and ran around for a while and I totally got some sun from being out in the field. Went home and we were both tuckered. I started doing some chores and introduced myself to my neighbor (the wife), Lisa, and talked with her for a while then ate my dinner. Eric called and we talked about school and I had to give him a much needed pep talk so we discussed that for a LONG time. Sos beeped in and I asked her about Friday and Jake's party was off so I was in the clear to go to Eric's Friday night. We talked about what a go getter Eric is and that they might come down to BBQ Saturday afternoon. Other cryptic stuff about our boys. I called Eric back and we finished our convo and I think he's going to try for May for his English class. I told him I'd walk him to class. Watched BL and read stuff online and went upstairs to go to bed. AD then sleep.

Monday 4/20, Castor's collar and jacket are too big so I called to see if I could exchange - yes. It was a really warm day so Castor and I went home to cool off. I left for downtown at 6:45 and sat in some traffic. Talked to Eric and told him I'd call him when I was back. Exchanged the coat without incident and same with the collar and I was out of there. Had leftover Japanese for dinner and called Eric back. Watched GG and did some laundry and watched the end of DwtS then talked to Susan who had big news. Gettin hitched next month. I have mixed feelings about it but she knows that and I’m sure I’m not the only one. Read some Architectural Digest before going to bed.

Sunday 4/19, Eric wanted to sleep in but of course I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep because I had a bunch of chores on my mind. I finally settled down and let him rest a while longer, but it was short lived because then he was all excited to get up and go. We laid in bed for a while and eventually I started letting my hands roam and they went to places that made Eric very happy. After that was done we got up and ready to run my errands. We headed to the Rack so I could return his shirt, then QFC for a donut and over to the frame shop to get a piece of glass for my picture. We decided to go over to Mudd Bay to check it out since Eric got some coupons at the Green Festival. I got some food and some new sweet potato treats. We stopped at the dog park on the way home and Mom called and asked me to come over early so Eric could help move a bookcase and I knew that would go over like a lead balloon and I told her he was already on the fence about coming and she was like, "Fine, come over at 6". I told Eric and he's like, "Fuck that, I'm not going at all". Great. We let Castor run around for a while and he got into playing with some of the other dogs when they were running in a pack so I brought him over to me and chilled him out. We stayed for a while then home and Mom called back and was like "Dinner is cancelled and the next time you want help with your computer or electrical or your dog walked you can forget it, ok?" and I just sat there and finally said, "Ok!" and hung up. I told Eric and he was like "Are you fucking kidding me?" and went off and said he'll never go over there again if it's going to be like that and that I help out and they don't even see it. I started crying because I hate this shit, the manipulation stuff. The keeping track of EVERYTHING. He held me for a while then said we should get going to S & C's for the ice cream cruise. I was in a blah mood and Eric was doing his best to cheer me up. We got there and hung out for a little bit then headed out in C's car down to Lake Union. We just barely made it there in time and saw they were dog friendly. We boarded and quickly made friends with the captain and he asked us trivia and I guessed the answer (Donovan). He was funny and his joke about Dale Chihuly made everyone giggle. It was about 45 minutes and Eric had some questions for him after it was over (of course). We decided to go get coffee and headed to Vivace. I got a cookie then the girl thought I didn't pay for it but I did and Eric said she was about to throw down and I'm like, whatever, I paid the $2, chill out. We sat and had our snacks and talked about cars and Chrystol loves the idea of me getting the Porsche Cayenne and said I'm her most fascinating friend. We went next door to Urban Beast and I got a jacket for Castor off the sale table and talked with Katie, who was very friendly and helpful. We went up to REI next and I found a great collar for Castor then went and found Eric and we eventually found C & S too. There was one neck pillow left with Dad on it; they're phasing him out. Eric thinks Dad is a better model than the new guy. We checked out and went back to Ballard. We took off cause it was 6 and I needed to hit the store. Eric had a frustrating time in the self check and ended up leaving everything. I got my groceries and we went home and Eric put them all away for me. I suggested OE She for dinner so we drove down with Castor and took our food home. It was good and we watched tv and eventually went upstairs to go to bed. I think we stayed up until 10:30.

Saturday 4/18, I set my alarm for 8 and got up and ready and headed up to the park with Castor to get some exercise but it was Parks Appreciation Day and the lot has all these spaces marked reserved but were empty. I was seething. I went up the road further and we hit the trails instead. We took Red Town up and jogged most of it until we hit the meadow restoration project. I read the little blurb and we explored it a little then I started getting paranoid about cougars and decided to head back down. Jogged back down, talked to Mom briefly on the way. 1.5 miles altogether. Castor had a ton of fun and I let him off leash the whole time except in the meadow. Home we went and I fed him. I texted Eric and he was up so we made plans for me to meet him at El Chupacabra. I showered and got ready then talked to Sos and hit the road shortly after. 50th was a mess so it took me longer than expected. I saw Eric right as I was going to park and he jumped in and said they don't open until noon (only 11:15 at this point) so we went down to Greenlake. Castor loves exploring new places so we walked up into the woods where Eric said kids are always smoking pot. He showed me the new skate park and it's very cool. We walked and talked and I was probing him about his relationship and upcoming arrival and he was less than enthusiastic and stamped it with a 50% null and void description. We walked back to the car and went back up, parked then walked around Phinney Ridge for 15 minutes or so talking about birthing class. Back to El Chupa and got a table outside in the sun. Both our buttcracks were showing. He told me he found some pictures from when he came to my house to cook for me and asked me if I remembered that I'd never had goat cheese and of course I remember, and now I love it. It was cute he has that memory. I'm glad I'm not the only who still thinks about the time we were together and how much fun we had and how many new things he introduced me to. Chrystol had called earlier so I listened to the message and she was pretending to be Corey, my assistant, and had my entire evening and Sunday planned and had me in stitches. Apparently Schuyler is Eric’s assistant, named Troy. We had lunch and the guy mixed up my order but when I got it it was good. I snagged the check when Eric went to the bathroom and he was mad and said I had to either let him give me money or draw a mustache on him with a red sharpie. I told him I was doing neither so he drew one on himself. It was ridiculous. It was time to go so I watched him struggle with the lock on his bike then we hugged and I took off, calling Susan on the way. Castor and I went over to her place and hung out for 45 minutes or so talking with her and Michael and watching him get ready for his softball game wearing Susan's pink hoodie and Julia's gear. I was so tired I told Susan I couldn't stick around and headed home. When I got there I stripped down and briefly did something on the computer then Eric showed up. I lured him into spending some time with me in bed but he was eager to get going to S&C's. He woke me up twice then was out. I fell back asleep and Sos called about plans for later and I told her I'd call her when I was up. Fell back asleep for another hour and a half. Finally pulled myself out of bed and took Castor out and called Eric. Chrystol said I sounded like a guy. Castor pooped dirt out from eating it the night before. Great. I went back in and got ready a little bit and ate some yogurt then headed over to their place. We hung out there looking at pictures and story telling and catching up since I haven't seen them for like 3 weeks. I got a text from Kay-See that told me she was bailing and I eventually headed down to Belltown for Hakim's birthday party. It took me a while to find parking because I refuse to pay and eventually found one. Walked down to Del Rey and wished Hakim a happy birthday and talked to Carmen for a long time then was on my own. Luckily about 20 minutes later Sos and Jake showed up with Julie. We talked and hung out and danced and the bouncer was gettin down on his perch and it totally cracked me up. I wanted to go home and headed out to the front where the rest of the crew was and we decided to take off. Hugs all around then out the door. Jake watched me run to my car then they caught up and followed me to the freeway. When I got home Castor was wild and so anxious. I felt bad for him. I took him out to go to the bathroom for a while then went in to get ready for bed. It was 1:00. Eric showed up soon after and to sleep we went.

Friday 4/17, I went to the park with Castor after work to do a lap or two and talked to Eric while I did. I told him I'd talked to Jason and how he said I didn't sound the same and my funk and he was so great. He told me to go out and hang out with friends and stop worrying about him and just go have fun. The solution to my problem is going out and socializing so that's a pretty easy fix. He also said it was ok to flirt with guys just don't blow any of them. He makes me laugh. We talked the whole time Castor and I walked and all the way home so it was really productive and I felt like a huge weight had been lifted. At home I fed Castor and hung out and waited to hear back from Kay-See on evening plans. I took off after 7 and found a million parking spots much to my delight. As I was walking over some guy was opening an electronic garage for his friend and as I was talking to K on the phone he was like "Hi" so I smiled then he's all "You're beautiful" and I was like "*half smile* Thanks" and kept walking. I checked behind me before I turned the corner to make sure he wasn't following me. K buzzed me up and her and Mandy were chatting in their pajamas. There were potato chips and dip and K ordered a large pepperoni pizza so we ate a ton of food. We gossiped about relationships and "I love you"s and R and getting back in the saddle. The girls did their nails and I booked K's ticket. I texted Eric about brunch and he was down so I told him I'd call him in the morning. We got out the cow tails and salted caramel ice cream. I left at 11:30 and raced home to a very excited Castor. I felt terrible leaving him all night. I took him out and we walked around for a while then in and up to bed.

Thursday 4/16, I had a dream about Chuck Bass and it was very good. I was trying to do laundry so I'd have something cute to wear the next time I saw him. Mmm. Took Castor on a nice walk on the trail and almost did two miles then home. I vacuumed the stairs and cleaned up the kitchen. Talked to Eric while I ate dinner and fed Castor then watched tv on and off while I updated this thing. Talked to Susan and told her about possible plans with RH Eric on Saturday. Jason called and I haven't talked to him in months and was wondering if I was going to Neighbs and asked me what's going on and told me not to fall in (to depression, I guess). He said the sparkle in my voice was gone. This was my wake up call. I told him I'd come in to see him soon at his restaurant. Watched Southland and went to sleep at 11.

Wednesday 4/15, I was tired after work but Castor and I still went for a walk. We went to the park by my house to the beach. He kept getting into the mud so I had to leash him. Talked to Jess and realized I probably wouldn't see her again before she left. Back at the house I relaxed and made dinner for both of us. I made rice, carrots and broccoli for me and Castor had some of the veggies with me. I talked to Eric for a long time then watched Scrubs and ANTM. Showered and read my wedding mag in bed and listened Dandy Warhols (newest one) and went to sleep by 10:15.

Tuesday 4/14, I went home and found Eric had just arrived and was going to take a shower. I relaxed with Castor. Eric wanted to watch the Mariners game so I took Castor up the hill to the park and we ran around for 45 minutes or so and I kept making him go up the hill and his tongue was really hanging out of his mouth by the end of it. At home Eric had everything prepped and ready to make dinner. We ate and I cleaned up and we went to DQ for an anniversary treat. I asked the guy if he would recommend the Truffle blizzard or the Oreo and he was like "I don't eat the ice cream here" very defiantly. I went with the truffle but as soon as he turned around Eric and I were laughing so hard. He was like "Really? YOU don't eat the ice cream here? Hmm" because this guy was not a light weight if you know what I mean. Whatever, it made us laugh. After we got our treats we walked over to the VW / Subaru dealership to look at the used cars and I gravitated toward the Audis and Porsches. Eric thinks I should get the a6 rather than the a4 if I decide to go that route. I don't think I need that much car, though they are much nicer inside. We also looked at a white Cayenne (sighhhh) but I was surprised the back wasn't bigger. Don't have to make any decisions yet. We went back to the car and headed home to watch the makeover portion of BL. We left the house at 9 for Dr. Dog. Parking was a piece of cake. The show was at the Crocodile and they moved the door so I opened it up and the guy was like "This is the exit now, go around the corner" and all these people were staring at me. Whoops. It is sooo different inside and way cooler. Not dirty at all. Though I guess that was part of the charm before. The first band was just finishing and though we hoped it was the Cave Singers, it wasn't. The lead singer of the CS was standing right in front of us. He's short. The place was pretty packed. We talked and laughed and people watched, which was fantastic. DD didn't go on until 11:25 but once they went on they were super good. Crowd loved them, but who wouldn't? Eric really enjoyed it. We decided to hit the road at 12:10 because we both had to work in the morning. Took Castor out when we got back and went to bed. Very tired.