Saturday 5/23, Neither alarm went off. The guy who came for our luggage accused me “You were still asleep!” finger wagging at me. I told him no and to give us 5 minutes then he could get our bags. I left one last monster entry for the log and Kass to find when she woke up. We said bye and headed to the front desk where Anders checked us out and we learned one of the Scots was going to be going with us because he was too terrified to fly then had all this paranoia about the boat and brought an entire backpack full of empty bottles in case the boat went down. Weirrrdd. So we took off and just as we were getting in the boat K spotted a baby spotted sting ray, so beautiful. Then on the ride in we saw all these dolphins feeding, such a good sendoff. Made it to the dock and situated then these three loud black ladies showed up and were saying fuck every other word and telling one of the guys working there to give her a dollar. Finally we were allowed to board and it was pretty full then we stopped at the Caye Caulker and even more people got on so that ride felt like it took forever. Got our bags into the taxi, to the airport, dropped off the Scot, went to check in. The girl wouldn’t let K go standby even with stitches and bloody gauze and said it would be $50 to go standby. We went thru and didn’t have to pay the departure tax, yay! Found a nice seat and nice view of cute guys. Waited for a while then Karen found me and we talked about the night before and Jodi using lots of pickup lines, then how fun it was meeting them. I boarded shortly after and left K. Read and listened to music for short two hour flight. At Houston customs and immigration were so painful and took forever and it made me worry for K not being able to make it to her Seattle flight. I called Eric when I got to my gate and we talked for a long time then I told him I needed to get something to eat. I got a pulled pork sandwich because I was in TX, then a Starbucks cookie. Boarding was shortly after and I sat next to a weird girl who left her pillow on my seat so I threw it on the floor. An old lady was watching me write in my journal updating this and said it was fascinating which was very cute and that she wanted to watched me the whole trip. Finally finished updating! I talked with Betty Joe through the rest of the flight and she was very nice and going to visit her daughter for the summer in Gig Harbor. We landed early and I called Eric. He was waiting down at the baggage claim and was all sexy stranger with his hair cut and his beard shaved to almost nothing and he was all role playing and I was like "Stop it, I feel like I'm cheating on my boyfriend and going to get caught". I went to baggage claim and learned I would have to jump through all sorts of hoops to get reimbursed for my cds, or not at all. We got my bags and went to the car and drove home in the beautiful sunshine. When we got there Castor was so excited to see me he kept trying to jump on me, which he hasn't done forever. He wouldn't stop leaning into me, it was so cute. I stripped down and showered and Eric stood in the bathroom and talked to me and I told him stories. I showed him pictures and he took me to DQ where I got a dipped cone. Mmm. He cleaned most of my house while I was gone and washed all the rugs and blankets and changed the sheets. So nice. Then there was a beautiful bouquet sitting by the bed. I was pretty tired so he took Castor out and helped me get all my medicated lotion on before bed. We got down to celebrating my arrival and went to bed.
Friday 5/22, We had to be at the dock at 8:30 so K set the alarm for 8 and we headed down to get fitted for our gear. Jodi gave me a mask with a pink tube and he called me Miss Pink and I thought it was cute that he gave me a nickname. We all loaded onto the boat and off we went a little after 9. We had to make a few stops to pick up other people but soon made out way out to Hol Chan Marine Reserve. Kass was joking with Jodi about his sexy gf calling him but he couldn’t talk because he was at work. Then we noticed how enormous his feet were and vowed to get a picture of them, though none were as good as our first opportunity. So we get to HC and I’m having second thoughts about the snorkeling because I’ve never done it before and I’m scared but before I know it Jodi was putting on my flippers and telling me my feet were as big as his and I scoffed and he laughed then Kass told him we were taking pictures of his. Then Kass asked him where she could smoke her stick a weed and Jodi told her to pipe down and that he’d meet us at Fido’s later. The next thing I knew Jodi was helping me slide off the front of the boat into the water. I got used to swimming and dipped my head under water and the underwater thing wasn’t bad at all. I saw fish and it was sooo crazy. I didn’t appreciate the barracuda very much though. All I kept saying was, “Those are dangerous right? Right?!” Jodi was soon leading us all over the reserve as a group and the fish and creatures we saw were amazing and like nothing I’ve seen before. Amazing. You can’t see this shit on tv. The currents in some spots were strong enough that I’d look around and would have moved considerably without trying at all. Scary a little. Swimming over the coral was the worst part for me because I didn’t know how close I was so I just didn’t kick a lot and stayed on the surface with my whole body. Stu and Al were taking tons of photos with their underwater cameras and soon Jodi pointed out a turtle and I freaked and was trying to get in Stu’s shot but don’t think I succeeded. That was the highlight along with the Spotted Sting Ray that was beautiful, and again, like nothing I’ve ever seen. Also when Jodi pointed at the Blue Razzle Dazzle fish and Major General fish. He fed fish and the eel (giant) and it was pretty hot how he knew all the fish and nooks and caves. Soon we (after an hour) were back getting on the boat and dried off and ate pineapple and had water pouches that tasted like pool water. We were there forever waiting for some divers then took off for Shark Ray Alley. I decided I didn’t want to get in once we got there so me and K stayed and took pictures and helped the guy throw fish in the water to the yellow eye jacks or grouper or whatever. Scuba Steve held a sting ray after Jodi showed him how to do it. Soon everyone got back on the boat and Chels picked at the peeling skin and reapplied sunscreen, apparently it didn’t really work. We made our way back and went to the bathroom upon returning. We all hung at the beach and ordered lunch after jumping in the pool with K and Al. Quesadillas because they were so good. Jose called Kass greedy cause she never tells him when she’d go smoke. Down at the beach we all hung out and talked for the entire afternoon. I was burning more and only mildly suspected it. I checked in and confirmed things with Anders who said he didn’t charge us the $25 round trip ferry price. I changed my fb status to Lyrical King’s “No shame in my game” and everyone commented and “liked” it. Made me laugh; especially Ryan Sween*y. Troy came in, the Jodi look-alike with huge dread concealing hat, and asked me how I was as I was walking by him and I said “good” and he was all “I can see that” then was chatting me up and introduced himself and did the penis finger handshake thing and I just played dumb like I didn’t feel it, but inside I was like “You wish Troy!” Back outside we made plans with the others and they were all bailing except Karen. Eventually we headed up to the room to start getting ready for the evening and decided to take the golf cart, all 5 of us. At 5:30 we needed to be leaving. We headed out with Dwayne saying he’d meet us at Fido’s at 10:30 / 11. We were taking a lot of pictures and made it through the first few big puddles fine but then 3 of us decided to get out and walk around it so we wouldn’t get bogged down, but then K slipped and punctured her arm and there was blood everywhere. She turned white immediately and we got back on Marty with her arm wrapped in a towel and hit the first resort and saw a couple leaving and asked them about it and the guy got out and said she’d def need stitches. K kept saying she was going to pass out and when we tried to move her she finally did, then there was another problem. The staff were jerks and refused to give us a clean towel and also that the bar was closed so they couldn’t give her any water or juice. They instructed me to go two resorts down to their beach bar so off I went. They were such dicks. Luckily the people at Journey’s End were nice and helpful and got me on my way. K was cleaning up when I got back and Chels had cleaned it out as best she could with the limited resources and they had called a water taxi to take us to a dr. Karen helped me get K out to the boat and I told the guy the situation and he vowed to take care of us and when we got to the dock said don’t worry about the fare and we’d figure it out later and sent another guy to take us to the road and get us situated with a taxi and a good doctor. The guy took us around the block to the clinic and came in with us to verify that the doctor was in and asked us if we wanted him to wait while we went in, we said it was ok. He stayed until the doctor took us back to his office. The nurse / assistant was less than enthused but doc was great. I’ve never been in a clinic in a third world country and soothing tells me this one was way above par. He said he’s the only master doc on the island and that when he moved there 20 years ago there were only three golf carts and one old school Land Rover, crazy! Anyway K had to get 2 stitches and a tetanus shot and he didn’t even numb the area when he did the stitches and she was such a trooper, did great. She paid and it was $75 total including the meds for 10 days and we were out of there to go to Fido’s and realized we were just around the corner and Kass caught us just before going in cause they were at Island Perk and spotted us and had bought K a little skirt so she went in Fido’s bathroom and washed up and changed and we all went and hung at IP and bitched about the Las Terrazes staff and the whole ordeal. And about the old crazy skinny lady with the enormous fake tits working behind the counter. They were closing up so we went across the street to Fido’s to get something to eat and all got appetizers and continued to laugh and talk about the crazy evening. I knew K wanted to go home so I went to check the ferry schedule and there was one leaving at 9 and the guys only seemed to mildly remember me but it was only a couple hours earlier that they’d given us a ride. I ran back and saw Jodi on the way in and he was all “Heyyy, where’s da crew?” so I pointed and he said he was smoking so I told him I’d tell Kass and ran back in. We finished and laughed a bit more at Chels trying to order a waiter with a sense of humor. We took off and when we were paying they didn’t charge us for the ride earlier but they knew who we were so I guess they were just nice guys. We boarded and were the last ones and the guy asked how the patient was doing. He dropped us then I ran into the office to get a key cause the girls had it and saw the taxi guy at the bar as I returned it. Stu and Al were on Steve’s deck with Martha and they yelled to us to come over so I made sure K was situated then headed over with the pineapple. They asked about the evening and I told them and Steve was worried it was Karen but I told them the whole thing and they were appalled at Las Terrazes and said we should write reviews on tripadvisor etc and Martha said she would have made such a scene and knocked on every guest’s room until help was given. All were shocked at the treatment, given how helpful all other experiences have been. K came up and we started talking and laughing and of course the conversation turned back to poop and the log and modern medicine and other stuff and eventually pick up lines and Al left the night with two great ones. We talked about vinegar and the chemistry of how it helps burns and asparagus and Steve agreed about oaty cheerios making pee smell. We said good night and how great it was to meet them and hang out and bid them good bye. We got ready for bed and finished packing up some final items then talked until we both drifted off. Probably 11:45.
Thursday 5/21, I had been stirring and thinking about going into town to get the cart and some fruit so as soon as we were all up I suggested it as I sat on the lanai eating raisin bran like every other morning. Chels got bent out of shape about plans and needing to leave within the hour so she ended up staying there while the three of us made arrangements to go in. The bitch in the office, Maria, was giving me all kinds of attitude but we knew we were fine and vowed to tell Dwayne so he double wouldn’t love her. We boarded the boat with the Mom of the lady who was married to the guy we hate, but we didn’t figure it out until a half hour into it. When we got off the boat we told her we would give her a ride to wherever she needed to go, but she insinuated she would just hang with us and like she was doing us a favor. It was hilarious. We went to Island Perk and got drinks and I looked at swimsuits again but decided I didn’t need anymore even though they were like $12. Next we went to Mambo Chill and Kass got a skirt, or maybe that was the other time, and soon we were on our way to the orange shop, closed, so we went back up to Front St to get coffee at the liquor store and then a gift shop for more and other spices and a pirate book for Jen. Back on the cart and over to the orange store where I got a bowl with a turtle on it and wanted more but restrained. We needed to hurry so K could take the resort ferry at 1:30. We stopped at 2 fruit stands: 1 for papaya (huge!) and one for 2 pineapples. We rushed down and Patricia and K caught it no problem and the driver put the fruit in the cooler. Kass and I looked for chocolate covered bananas without success then started the trip back and stopped at that beachside bar that kind of sucked and wasn’t even close to being as cool as Kali’s. We didn’t have any problems and made it through the puddles which were still pretty big. When we got back K was down at the beach and Chels was in the office on the phone sorting out bills. We got our suits on and headed down by K and soon C came out and we were all talking and laughing and saw Dwayne come up and he was to be working the bar for the evening so that would be fun. I went up to the room at some point and ate almost all of that papaya by myself. K helped at the end. Back down at the beach I was sitting at the bar with Chels when the neighbs all came home from their all day excursion to the ruins. They were all exhausted and seemed to be regretting the trip, plus it was Karen’s bday – fun! Stu had the idea to order two pieces of cake and to sing so that was set for a later surprise. In the meantime we all sat down at the bar talking and laughing and taking lots of pictures until it started getting dark. We all decided to get some dinner and got our orders in and then I went up to take a shower. When I got back down we sang and ate cake and soon after our dinner arrived. Stu and I talked for a long time about his ex-wife and other relationships and I have a better appreciation for him and think he really is a good guy and so smart. He started getting all sentimental on us saying how glad he was that we were there and it was refreshing to not have more married couples in the resort. It was nice. People started trickling out but we were still having a blast especially watching Chels and Dwayne and pretending to hump the stools and post then turning around like nothing was happening when Dwayne went to look. Karen was really fun and we all stayed down until like 10:30 or something. I confirmed with Anders that we were going to do the scuba trip the next day and all our neighbs decided to do it too. Stu told Kass he thought they got off on the wrong foot and wanted to apologize or something and she sing song-y said “I don’t know what you’re talking about” so I think he felt better. We headed up to bed and yelled good night to each other again, like the prior night, and went up to find ditcher K in bed watching “So You Think You Can Dance” and I almost died it was so ridiculous. The guy with the umbrella killed me. I cut up the pineapple and ate almost all of it with the other girls helping just a little. We watched for a while then we all trickled off to bed and I read a mag for a while.
Wednesday 5/20, We woke up to the sound of Steve machete-ing open coconuts, Kass yelled out the door. We are all up. We decided to drive into town so we got ready and hit the road. It had rained a few nights prior but the road was still filled with lots of holes and crazy big “puddles” or tide pools. We were doing fine and trudging through until we got to an enormous one and totally got stuck. Chels and me were trying to get the strewn-about boards under and pushing and almost had it then three locals rolled through with no problem and bailed out and got up to their calves in the disgustingness and lifted the whole damn thing out. Another couple guys came up behind us as we were rolling to town so we let them go first and we followed their path. We stopped at Beach n Kitchen again and rinsed off with the hose but the lady rubbed Chels the wrong way. We used the bathroom and washed hands and ordered breakfast; I got the French Toast and it was sooo good. We rolled out of there and into town. We hit Mambo Chill, Island Perk where there were a few cute expats without shoes. I got the brownie and we all shared. We cruised town for a long time and went as far south as the paved road goes. We went to Ramone’s and donated $20 each to the Humane Society and he was super appreciative and got our emails. I noticed the Barely Legal dvd on top of the tv – laughed. We went to the store but the guy tried to rip us off but we made him start over and came out much better. We hit the Greenhouse then locked up Marty on a side street and headed for the Island Ferry. It was a much different experience but we got there safe and sound. I think we sat at the pool for 20 minutes and talked and cooled off then had to get ready, which we did in a jiff then all of us were off for dinner, etc. We took lots of pics on the way in and all the neighbs were laughing so hard and Kass was being really vulgar. When we arrived Marty was gone and we started to freak, but someone had just taken off the brake and moved it across the street and down a ways so off we went. All of the neighbs except Steve and Martha took off for Sunset while we went to check out a local spot – Shelly’s, but it was closed so we vowed to meet up with them there in a half hour to try again. We drove around and ended up in he ghetto. Kass didn’t seem to care but I was like “Can we turn around yet?” We finally did on some back road by the airport that reminded me of the sugar cane fields by Na Pali where bodies get dumped all the time. Girls needed a lighter then we cruised town and eventually met back up wit S & M but Shelly’s was still closed so we found another local spot, Coco’s and sat outside, sad to see the baby kittens and dog tied up. Chels fed him and found water. We all ordered and Kass and both got yummy chicken with some bbq flavor. We were there for a long time and some guy yelled out of his van “Lucky guy!” cause Steve was surrounded by 5 women. We talked about his work and not crossing picket lines – crazy. Kass was baffled. After dinner we all loaded up and drove past where the chicken drop was supposed to be (no blowing in ass apparently) but no one there so we drove over to Wet Willy’s and found them all there with Al and Stu hitting on girls, but I could tell they weren’t getting very far. We started dancing and Kat was showing everyone her stripper moves and I was thoroughly impressed. Kass wanted a chocolate covered banana so five of us girls took off in search, found them at the store and bought the last ones then took ridiculous pictures with them. We danced and laughed and took pics then went outside after the bad songs started. A group of 4 23-year olds came over and had no idea how to hit on girls. They were insulting us and then one said San Fran is really right wing and Jacksonville, FL is more liberal and Kass and I just sat there like “Is this guy joking?” but he totally wasn’t. Finally after enough insults Kass had had enough and we took off to yell at the girls for leaving us over there with them. Some JT was played and that got us in the mood again. I saw Stu talking to red shirt (one of the idiots) and I was like “Of course Stu made friends with the idiot”. We eventually decided to go to Fido’s for live music and Stu and Al told us they would meet us over there. As we were leaving some guy grabbed Kassie and pretended he was going to throw her off the dock and she went off then security chased him down with their sticks. First time anything sketch happened, which is interesting considering how forward men are. We walked over and found everyone and got some tables and watched some white rasta fari play and sing and sang along with Sublime. Kat was ready to go and wanted to catch the 10 ferry and we were hoping to score a deal so we headed over and Kass was the negotiator and bargained it down from $13 to $10, yes! We loaded on and saw the annoying Southerners from the water taxi, ughh. Of course Stu made friends with them as well. We made stops and one scary in the dark with a girl who didn’t speak up when everyone asked who was getting off there. Apparently TI was filmed at the Captain Morgan’s resort, Court will be so excited. Finally we were dropped off and we all meandered to our places and yelled good night to one another across the courtyard and pool. Us girls probably talked for a while and got ready for bed and fell asleep.
Tuesday 5/19, I woke up at 7:50 and wrote in this for 30 minutes then got up and had some cereal on the lanai with K. We decided to stay put for the day and took our time getting ready to hit the beach. Steve had a coconut and shared with us and I was bitching about pooping so I was like “gimme” because Cory and Filipe told me the juice acts as a laxative. He gave me some meat, though it wasn’t all that sweet. We headed down to the bar but the girls were getting lounge chairs. I sat with Steve and Karen at the bar until they left then checked email and got a hilarious Belgium Rose reference from Eric and a comment from LPC on my status. I got a fruity smoothie from Chels’ bf who called her his gf and said give her anything she wants. Laid down then out in the water on the yellow floaty things and tried to avoid jelly fish in the sea grass even though we didn’t see any. Back on shore Chels and Kass ordered lunch and Kass got a really good quesadilla so I had a triangle then K and I went up to the room and made ourselves lunch and I had a quesadilla with leftover stuff and it was pretty good. We went back down and I laid under the umbrella some more and wrote in this and listened to music and we did that for a few more hours. We were thinking about going to one of the other resorts for dinner but as the night went on we decided on Mama Caribe’s because they were having beef kabobs. Everyone got burnt except me so I went down by the pool in the shade and K eventually joined me as we waited for the neighbs to come home. Finally we saw the bikes roll off the dock and knew they’d skipped the ride home. Steve came over and talked to K and me for a while and told us Martha had brought us some coconut empanadas – how sweet. Karen came over and we talked about AA and the bartender a few resorts down she made out with last time. We went up and got ready and went to MC’s, which as empty so we got the royal treatment and didn’t have to pay for dessert and Chels got her fish at the lower price. We stayed in there and laughed and talked for a while. Headed back home, sat on the porch and eventually Al came out and chatted with us and we talked about poop forever and showed him the poop log. Stu came out for a little while, but was too grossed out so he left. K went to bed and we all stayed up for a while then to bed.
Monday 5/18, Woke up just before 8 and Kass had slept 14 hours. We sat outside eating our breakfast then Chels got upset by something Kass said and it started all this morning drama, unfortunately. We decided to take the golf cart into town and started getting ready then found Chels and she wasn’t going to come so we took off for the 7 mile adventure. The ride was insane and now we all know why the staff thought it was so hilarious that we wanted to drive it. It took us about 45 minutes but we stopped 1.5 miles north of the bridge at Beach N Kitchen and had a little breakfast, each getting the breakfast burrito and sharing an order of French Toast – it was all delish. Back on the road we drove the rest of the way in and hit the gas station then made our way over to find the French Bakery where we each got a treat (apple turnover thing) then off to find the wine shop where Kass picked out a few South American reds and we vowed to be back for cheese. We kept driving south exploring and saw some fun places then turned around to go to Mambo Chill because I wanted to get a tunic to cover my burned shoulders and neck. Kass helped me pick a white one with some maroon stitching then found these cute headbands and we started trying a bunch on and I got 2 – a pink design and a yellow skull. Next we went to the jewelry shop and my ring was gone which I was semi-relieved about then over to Island Perk for a drink. I got a chocolate milk and we looked at some semi-cute guys at the bar and a lady with huge collagen lips. Back in the cart we went to the Greenhouse and did our shopping and they had a shitload of fruit and veggies. Some guy yelled at us “Charlie’s Angels!” as we drove away from him and we all laughed hysterically. Another fellow just asked us a string of questions, “Do you want to go to the beach? Do you want to have dinner? Would you like to have a drink? Do you want to come over to my house?” etc. He blew his proverbial load. We went back to the wine shop and Kass picked up the cheese and back on the road we went for home. The “road” was a little better because the water had mostly evaporated from the rain the night before. K had her legs up to tan and asked us to warn her if there were any people coming and after we passed 2 guys on the side of the road selling necklaces and said hi she was like “Thanks guys!” and we were like “Oops, sorry!” her “It looks like I’m birthing back here!” and Kass told her not to worry because those same guys had seen Chels peeing on the side of the road the day prior. We made it back and unloaded all our stuff and got ready to hit the pool. Karen and Steve and later Kathy, all came down to talk to us. We hung for a long time then I think I checked my email and wrote to Eric and updated my status to “Everting curry!” then realized everyone would misinterpret it and think I was talking about my dinner or food preference or something. Back up at the casa Kass and Chels seemed to have made up and we all ended up out on the deck talking about poop FOREVER and I know the boys heard some of it but no one really cared. We talked about going out after dinner with them. We started making dinner: guac, salsa, chips, quesadillas with tomato, sour cream, butter and salt and pepper (from Mama Caribe’s), green peppers and onions. It was all really delicious and we all ate a ton including a bunch of baguette and brie. We put aged white cheddar and low fat regular cheddar on our meals and stuffed ourselves. We started cleaning up and noticed the lightening getting closer and closer and Duane walked by and told Chels “Good night to make a baby” and we all giggled. All of a sudden the storm was upon us, and we remembered our neighbors were down a few resorts playing pool, and we weren’t sure how they were getting home in that mess. The girls all disrobed and ran out onto the lanai and were getting soaked and Kass decided to take a shower (since the shower is mostly salt water) and was slipping and sliding all over the place. They were all laughing hysterically and letting all the rain and wind in, bah. I was a grinch and wanted to keep it dry in there. It wasn’t that bad. I was tired and started getting ready for bed and we all laid in the dark talking and all drifted off without bidding each other good night.
Sunday 5/17, Woke up at 7:50 – almost slept 12 hours. Very good sleep. We had some breakfast and decided to go on a walk down the beach. We saw crabs, lots of different fish and a couple beached manowars, ouch. We didn’t walk very far because the beach got garbage-y quickly, ick. Walked back and sat on the end of the dock and interrupted the couple trying to hump in the water. It was really nice sitting out there. A hammock would have been better. Into the office to check email and Kass was on schedule but couldn’t find Chels and was pissed – next email – she found her – on their way. Good. I asked the front desk guy about golf cart rentals and bakeries and grocery stores, and got the dl on all of it. Even a French bakery for Kass. We went and got the room all packed up and got ready to take the 10am water taxi in, but stopped to ask Anders to make sure to get the fridge stuff. He’s my favorite. We went out and boarded the boat and went in and headed to find the bakery. It was so fucking hot and K could feel sweat in her butt; me down my back. I was getting hungry and cranky and super hot so I was extremely upset when the bakery was closed (Sunday). We kept walking and tried to find Ruby’s and when we did it was a little disappointing and my donut was stale – K’s cinnamon roll was better. We kept walking and stopped in every place that was open to get the AC. We found a couple really good shops that ended up being owned by the same British woman (born in Italy, raised in UK, lived in LA for 10 years, moved to Belize). Mambo Chill was the best and I got some earring and vowed to come back with Kass. We went to a little jewelry place where I found some rings I loved but didn’t buy – specifically the white agate one. Next we went to this shop that was having a crazy sale and I got the cutest red and white polka dot bikini for like $18 and a pink long dress for quite a bit more. We went back across to Fido’s and had some lunch while checking out the cute real estate guy at the next table who I’d seen in the Cuban place earlier while walking down Front St. After we finished lunch we started walking down to the ferry terminal / dock and out of the Cuban place jumps and yelling is someone and I thought it was a local, but nope, it was Kass and Chels who had taken the plane over from Belize City and had already rented a golf cart, which I told her I didn’t know if it was a good idea or not. We went to the store and got a bunch of stuff then raced back to the dock where our taxi guy was and we told him what was up and gave Kass as much direction as I knew and we took the bags and groceries and headed to the taxi. Everyone on the boat was giving us a hard time so we told them what was going on and they all laughed. We got back and told Anders about our adventures and he gave us the key to our new room and we went and explored and marveled at the view – superb. We semi unpacked and went out to sit on our new lanai, beautiful. K went down to the beach and I waited upstairs outside and eventually saw them pull up with Anders in tow. We got them upstairs then we all trickled down to the pool and the couple next to us, who ended up not being a couple at all, asked us where we were from so we started talking to them and learned they were in the room next to us and there was a whole group of them: Stuart (we called him Stu or Stuey, even though no one else did), Steve, Al, Karen and Kathy. We all ended up in the pool talking and laughing and bonding. Karen and Kathy are sisters and 20 months apart, like us, and Karen was the older one. It was hard to keep the two sets of sisters straight. Soo funny. We stayed down there for a long time swimming and hang out and laughed when Stu dropped his chicken wing in the pool. Eventually we went back up to the room except Chels who was asleep by the pool and stayed that way for another hour or so, despite both groups of us yelling down to her from our decks. We got ready to get something to eat and went to Mama Caribe’s and the three of us all shared our dinners but K didn’t like hers – too sweet. Kass ordered the chocolate cake for dessert and we polished it off and went back to the room. It got dark shortly after so K and I went out on the lanai and played several rounds of the boy game and laughed at the results, especially Schuyler and all his sexual prowess. Eventually Chels woke up and was famished and asked if it was too late to get food and I said it was probably close to closing then looked at my watch and it was 7:30. 7 f-ing 30. We thought it was after 9. The waiter brought Chels’ food and we sat laughing while she ate then we saw our neighbors coming back from the bar and they started coming up on our stairs and were like “knock knock” and sat down (Stu & Steve) and we started talking and eventually Al joined in too. Chels was stuck with Stu most of the time while K and me chatted with the two other boys. Everyone was annoyed with Stu by the end. We had a good time overall and eventually called it a night by 10:30 and climbed into bed.
Saturday 5/16, Arrived and both of us were sooo tired. Found Starbucks and got drinks and chocolate cake. We wandered looking at all the places to eat and found our gate. Went back to get food and I found cheap veggie bagel and it was like $2 while all bad stuff was super $$. Only in Texas, I guess. K found some food then we sat at the gate and ate, waiting for our next flight and checking out the cute / aloof guy close to us. Finally boarded and I slept for most of the 2.5 hour flight. K sat next to the fat guy this time, heh. Walked off the tarmac through immigration, got bags, changed into slippers, through customs and out to the taxi waiting for us with a sign. Talked to the driver most the way there through Belize City to the ferry terminal; Belize City not that attractive from the route we took. Bought our tickets and waited watching 12 hours or some shit in the air conditioned terminal lobby then the loud guy came in and asked K about her bag and apparently one of her sunscreens exploded and leaked everywhere. Time to board, we lined up outside and the captain called down to us “You two – come up here!” and I was like “Us two?” and he said yes and again I was like “Us?” and him, “Yeah!” then the bitch who was trying to cut in front of us was like “Is there room for three?” and I was like “Beat it” but he allowed her to come up too. Damn. Then these irritating Americans came up too and I hated them and I think K took a picture of their buttcracks. Luckily we got the good seats. Off we went and it was so cool, took pictures and it was amazing. Loved it but totally got scorched. Arrived on Ambergris but our guy wasn’t there to meet us from Belize Legacy so we called and he arrived a minute later. He took our bags and took us to the store and we picked up a few things to eat then went to the BLR dock and loaded up. K and I strategized how to be first in line to check in. Off the boat and first in because I’m young and nimble and got it figured out and in 4C – Garden room with peek-a-boo view of the sea. We settled in and I discovered my cds and dvds were gone and I think someone at the airport stole them. We ate a little then decided to go lay out even though I was already burned from the ride in on my shoulders and neck. We grabbed our stuff and found a nice spot on the beach. I read and listened to my ipod and K fell asleep. We were out there for a while then decided to go back up and shower. At some point we checked our email and facebook after the power came back on (5pm). We asked the front desk if we could get a room with a view or upstairs room and they told us they could move us the next day and to just pack our things and they would get everything moved for us. So accommodating. We showered and got ready and decided to go to Mama Caribe’s and split a dinner and got the Achiote chicken with Belize spices; it was really good and we ate all of it. K was really out of it and it was hilarious. We got dessert and while we were waiting for it I was really out of it. We laughed. Dessert was delish (lemon meringue) and our waiter said we should go out but we were way too tired and had no way in; he said he’d make sure we could get a ride in on the staff run. V. sweet. We went back to the room and got ready for bed and put on Monster in Law and both did some reading and passed out by 8:30. Both slept like babies.
Friday 5/22, We had to be at the dock at 8:30 so K set the alarm for 8 and we headed down to get fitted for our gear. Jodi gave me a mask with a pink tube and he called me Miss Pink and I thought it was cute that he gave me a nickname. We all loaded onto the boat and off we went a little after 9. We had to make a few stops to pick up other people but soon made out way out to Hol Chan Marine Reserve. Kass was joking with Jodi about his sexy gf calling him but he couldn’t talk because he was at work. Then we noticed how enormous his feet were and vowed to get a picture of them, though none were as good as our first opportunity. So we get to HC and I’m having second thoughts about the snorkeling because I’ve never done it before and I’m scared but before I know it Jodi was putting on my flippers and telling me my feet were as big as his and I scoffed and he laughed then Kass told him we were taking pictures of his. Then Kass asked him where she could smoke her stick a weed and Jodi told her to pipe down and that he’d meet us at Fido’s later. The next thing I knew Jodi was helping me slide off the front of the boat into the water. I got used to swimming and dipped my head under water and the underwater thing wasn’t bad at all. I saw fish and it was sooo crazy. I didn’t appreciate the barracuda very much though. All I kept saying was, “Those are dangerous right? Right?!” Jodi was soon leading us all over the reserve as a group and the fish and creatures we saw were amazing and like nothing I’ve seen before. Amazing. You can’t see this shit on tv. The currents in some spots were strong enough that I’d look around and would have moved considerably without trying at all. Scary a little. Swimming over the coral was the worst part for me because I didn’t know how close I was so I just didn’t kick a lot and stayed on the surface with my whole body. Stu and Al were taking tons of photos with their underwater cameras and soon Jodi pointed out a turtle and I freaked and was trying to get in Stu’s shot but don’t think I succeeded. That was the highlight along with the Spotted Sting Ray that was beautiful, and again, like nothing I’ve ever seen. Also when Jodi pointed at the Blue Razzle Dazzle fish and Major General fish. He fed fish and the eel (giant) and it was pretty hot how he knew all the fish and nooks and caves. Soon we (after an hour) were back getting on the boat and dried off and ate pineapple and had water pouches that tasted like pool water. We were there forever waiting for some divers then took off for Shark Ray Alley. I decided I didn’t want to get in once we got there so me and K stayed and took pictures and helped the guy throw fish in the water to the yellow eye jacks or grouper or whatever. Scuba Steve held a sting ray after Jodi showed him how to do it. Soon everyone got back on the boat and Chels picked at the peeling skin and reapplied sunscreen, apparently it didn’t really work. We made our way back and went to the bathroom upon returning. We all hung at the beach and ordered lunch after jumping in the pool with K and Al. Quesadillas because they were so good. Jose called Kass greedy cause she never tells him when she’d go smoke. Down at the beach we all hung out and talked for the entire afternoon. I was burning more and only mildly suspected it. I checked in and confirmed things with Anders who said he didn’t charge us the $25 round trip ferry price. I changed my fb status to Lyrical King’s “No shame in my game” and everyone commented and “liked” it. Made me laugh; especially Ryan Sween*y. Troy came in, the Jodi look-alike with huge dread concealing hat, and asked me how I was as I was walking by him and I said “good” and he was all “I can see that” then was chatting me up and introduced himself and did the penis finger handshake thing and I just played dumb like I didn’t feel it, but inside I was like “You wish Troy!” Back outside we made plans with the others and they were all bailing except Karen. Eventually we headed up to the room to start getting ready for the evening and decided to take the golf cart, all 5 of us. At 5:30 we needed to be leaving. We headed out with Dwayne saying he’d meet us at Fido’s at 10:30 / 11. We were taking a lot of pictures and made it through the first few big puddles fine but then 3 of us decided to get out and walk around it so we wouldn’t get bogged down, but then K slipped and punctured her arm and there was blood everywhere. She turned white immediately and we got back on Marty with her arm wrapped in a towel and hit the first resort and saw a couple leaving and asked them about it and the guy got out and said she’d def need stitches. K kept saying she was going to pass out and when we tried to move her she finally did, then there was another problem. The staff were jerks and refused to give us a clean towel and also that the bar was closed so they couldn’t give her any water or juice. They instructed me to go two resorts down to their beach bar so off I went. They were such dicks. Luckily the people at Journey’s End were nice and helpful and got me on my way. K was cleaning up when I got back and Chels had cleaned it out as best she could with the limited resources and they had called a water taxi to take us to a dr. Karen helped me get K out to the boat and I told the guy the situation and he vowed to take care of us and when we got to the dock said don’t worry about the fare and we’d figure it out later and sent another guy to take us to the road and get us situated with a taxi and a good doctor. The guy took us around the block to the clinic and came in with us to verify that the doctor was in and asked us if we wanted him to wait while we went in, we said it was ok. He stayed until the doctor took us back to his office. The nurse / assistant was less than enthused but doc was great. I’ve never been in a clinic in a third world country and soothing tells me this one was way above par. He said he’s the only master doc on the island and that when he moved there 20 years ago there were only three golf carts and one old school Land Rover, crazy! Anyway K had to get 2 stitches and a tetanus shot and he didn’t even numb the area when he did the stitches and she was such a trooper, did great. She paid and it was $75 total including the meds for 10 days and we were out of there to go to Fido’s and realized we were just around the corner and Kass caught us just before going in cause they were at Island Perk and spotted us and had bought K a little skirt so she went in Fido’s bathroom and washed up and changed and we all went and hung at IP and bitched about the Las Terrazes staff and the whole ordeal. And about the old crazy skinny lady with the enormous fake tits working behind the counter. They were closing up so we went across the street to Fido’s to get something to eat and all got appetizers and continued to laugh and talk about the crazy evening. I knew K wanted to go home so I went to check the ferry schedule and there was one leaving at 9 and the guys only seemed to mildly remember me but it was only a couple hours earlier that they’d given us a ride. I ran back and saw Jodi on the way in and he was all “Heyyy, where’s da crew?” so I pointed and he said he was smoking so I told him I’d tell Kass and ran back in. We finished and laughed a bit more at Chels trying to order a waiter with a sense of humor. We took off and when we were paying they didn’t charge us for the ride earlier but they knew who we were so I guess they were just nice guys. We boarded and were the last ones and the guy asked how the patient was doing. He dropped us then I ran into the office to get a key cause the girls had it and saw the taxi guy at the bar as I returned it. Stu and Al were on Steve’s deck with Martha and they yelled to us to come over so I made sure K was situated then headed over with the pineapple. They asked about the evening and I told them and Steve was worried it was Karen but I told them the whole thing and they were appalled at Las Terrazes and said we should write reviews on tripadvisor etc and Martha said she would have made such a scene and knocked on every guest’s room until help was given. All were shocked at the treatment, given how helpful all other experiences have been. K came up and we started talking and laughing and of course the conversation turned back to poop and the log and modern medicine and other stuff and eventually pick up lines and Al left the night with two great ones. We talked about vinegar and the chemistry of how it helps burns and asparagus and Steve agreed about oaty cheerios making pee smell. We said good night and how great it was to meet them and hang out and bid them good bye. We got ready for bed and finished packing up some final items then talked until we both drifted off. Probably 11:45.
Thursday 5/21, I had been stirring and thinking about going into town to get the cart and some fruit so as soon as we were all up I suggested it as I sat on the lanai eating raisin bran like every other morning. Chels got bent out of shape about plans and needing to leave within the hour so she ended up staying there while the three of us made arrangements to go in. The bitch in the office, Maria, was giving me all kinds of attitude but we knew we were fine and vowed to tell Dwayne so he double wouldn’t love her. We boarded the boat with the Mom of the lady who was married to the guy we hate, but we didn’t figure it out until a half hour into it. When we got off the boat we told her we would give her a ride to wherever she needed to go, but she insinuated she would just hang with us and like she was doing us a favor. It was hilarious. We went to Island Perk and got drinks and I looked at swimsuits again but decided I didn’t need anymore even though they were like $12. Next we went to Mambo Chill and Kass got a skirt, or maybe that was the other time, and soon we were on our way to the orange shop, closed, so we went back up to Front St to get coffee at the liquor store and then a gift shop for more and other spices and a pirate book for Jen. Back on the cart and over to the orange store where I got a bowl with a turtle on it and wanted more but restrained. We needed to hurry so K could take the resort ferry at 1:30. We stopped at 2 fruit stands: 1 for papaya (huge!) and one for 2 pineapples. We rushed down and Patricia and K caught it no problem and the driver put the fruit in the cooler. Kass and I looked for chocolate covered bananas without success then started the trip back and stopped at that beachside bar that kind of sucked and wasn’t even close to being as cool as Kali’s. We didn’t have any problems and made it through the puddles which were still pretty big. When we got back K was down at the beach and Chels was in the office on the phone sorting out bills. We got our suits on and headed down by K and soon C came out and we were all talking and laughing and saw Dwayne come up and he was to be working the bar for the evening so that would be fun. I went up to the room at some point and ate almost all of that papaya by myself. K helped at the end. Back down at the beach I was sitting at the bar with Chels when the neighbs all came home from their all day excursion to the ruins. They were all exhausted and seemed to be regretting the trip, plus it was Karen’s bday – fun! Stu had the idea to order two pieces of cake and to sing so that was set for a later surprise. In the meantime we all sat down at the bar talking and laughing and taking lots of pictures until it started getting dark. We all decided to get some dinner and got our orders in and then I went up to take a shower. When I got back down we sang and ate cake and soon after our dinner arrived. Stu and I talked for a long time about his ex-wife and other relationships and I have a better appreciation for him and think he really is a good guy and so smart. He started getting all sentimental on us saying how glad he was that we were there and it was refreshing to not have more married couples in the resort. It was nice. People started trickling out but we were still having a blast especially watching Chels and Dwayne and pretending to hump the stools and post then turning around like nothing was happening when Dwayne went to look. Karen was really fun and we all stayed down until like 10:30 or something. I confirmed with Anders that we were going to do the scuba trip the next day and all our neighbs decided to do it too. Stu told Kass he thought they got off on the wrong foot and wanted to apologize or something and she sing song-y said “I don’t know what you’re talking about” so I think he felt better. We headed up to bed and yelled good night to each other again, like the prior night, and went up to find ditcher K in bed watching “So You Think You Can Dance” and I almost died it was so ridiculous. The guy with the umbrella killed me. I cut up the pineapple and ate almost all of it with the other girls helping just a little. We watched for a while then we all trickled off to bed and I read a mag for a while.
Wednesday 5/20, We woke up to the sound of Steve machete-ing open coconuts, Kass yelled out the door. We are all up. We decided to drive into town so we got ready and hit the road. It had rained a few nights prior but the road was still filled with lots of holes and crazy big “puddles” or tide pools. We were doing fine and trudging through until we got to an enormous one and totally got stuck. Chels and me were trying to get the strewn-about boards under and pushing and almost had it then three locals rolled through with no problem and bailed out and got up to their calves in the disgustingness and lifted the whole damn thing out. Another couple guys came up behind us as we were rolling to town so we let them go first and we followed their path. We stopped at Beach n Kitchen again and rinsed off with the hose but the lady rubbed Chels the wrong way. We used the bathroom and washed hands and ordered breakfast; I got the French Toast and it was sooo good. We rolled out of there and into town. We hit Mambo Chill, Island Perk where there were a few cute expats without shoes. I got the brownie and we all shared. We cruised town for a long time and went as far south as the paved road goes. We went to Ramone’s and donated $20 each to the Humane Society and he was super appreciative and got our emails. I noticed the Barely Legal dvd on top of the tv – laughed. We went to the store but the guy tried to rip us off but we made him start over and came out much better. We hit the Greenhouse then locked up Marty on a side street and headed for the Island Ferry. It was a much different experience but we got there safe and sound. I think we sat at the pool for 20 minutes and talked and cooled off then had to get ready, which we did in a jiff then all of us were off for dinner, etc. We took lots of pics on the way in and all the neighbs were laughing so hard and Kass was being really vulgar. When we arrived Marty was gone and we started to freak, but someone had just taken off the brake and moved it across the street and down a ways so off we went. All of the neighbs except Steve and Martha took off for Sunset while we went to check out a local spot – Shelly’s, but it was closed so we vowed to meet up with them there in a half hour to try again. We drove around and ended up in he ghetto. Kass didn’t seem to care but I was like “Can we turn around yet?” We finally did on some back road by the airport that reminded me of the sugar cane fields by Na Pali where bodies get dumped all the time. Girls needed a lighter then we cruised town and eventually met back up wit S & M but Shelly’s was still closed so we found another local spot, Coco’s and sat outside, sad to see the baby kittens and dog tied up. Chels fed him and found water. We all ordered and Kass and both got yummy chicken with some bbq flavor. We were there for a long time and some guy yelled out of his van “Lucky guy!” cause Steve was surrounded by 5 women. We talked about his work and not crossing picket lines – crazy. Kass was baffled. After dinner we all loaded up and drove past where the chicken drop was supposed to be (no blowing in ass apparently) but no one there so we drove over to Wet Willy’s and found them all there with Al and Stu hitting on girls, but I could tell they weren’t getting very far. We started dancing and Kat was showing everyone her stripper moves and I was thoroughly impressed. Kass wanted a chocolate covered banana so five of us girls took off in search, found them at the store and bought the last ones then took ridiculous pictures with them. We danced and laughed and took pics then went outside after the bad songs started. A group of 4 23-year olds came over and had no idea how to hit on girls. They were insulting us and then one said San Fran is really right wing and Jacksonville, FL is more liberal and Kass and I just sat there like “Is this guy joking?” but he totally wasn’t. Finally after enough insults Kass had had enough and we took off to yell at the girls for leaving us over there with them. Some JT was played and that got us in the mood again. I saw Stu talking to red shirt (one of the idiots) and I was like “Of course Stu made friends with the idiot”. We eventually decided to go to Fido’s for live music and Stu and Al told us they would meet us over there. As we were leaving some guy grabbed Kassie and pretended he was going to throw her off the dock and she went off then security chased him down with their sticks. First time anything sketch happened, which is interesting considering how forward men are. We walked over and found everyone and got some tables and watched some white rasta fari play and sing and sang along with Sublime. Kat was ready to go and wanted to catch the 10 ferry and we were hoping to score a deal so we headed over and Kass was the negotiator and bargained it down from $13 to $10, yes! We loaded on and saw the annoying Southerners from the water taxi, ughh. Of course Stu made friends with them as well. We made stops and one scary in the dark with a girl who didn’t speak up when everyone asked who was getting off there. Apparently TI was filmed at the Captain Morgan’s resort, Court will be so excited. Finally we were dropped off and we all meandered to our places and yelled good night to one another across the courtyard and pool. Us girls probably talked for a while and got ready for bed and fell asleep.
Tuesday 5/19, I woke up at 7:50 and wrote in this for 30 minutes then got up and had some cereal on the lanai with K. We decided to stay put for the day and took our time getting ready to hit the beach. Steve had a coconut and shared with us and I was bitching about pooping so I was like “gimme” because Cory and Filipe told me the juice acts as a laxative. He gave me some meat, though it wasn’t all that sweet. We headed down to the bar but the girls were getting lounge chairs. I sat with Steve and Karen at the bar until they left then checked email and got a hilarious Belgium Rose reference from Eric and a comment from LPC on my status. I got a fruity smoothie from Chels’ bf who called her his gf and said give her anything she wants. Laid down then out in the water on the yellow floaty things and tried to avoid jelly fish in the sea grass even though we didn’t see any. Back on shore Chels and Kass ordered lunch and Kass got a really good quesadilla so I had a triangle then K and I went up to the room and made ourselves lunch and I had a quesadilla with leftover stuff and it was pretty good. We went back down and I laid under the umbrella some more and wrote in this and listened to music and we did that for a few more hours. We were thinking about going to one of the other resorts for dinner but as the night went on we decided on Mama Caribe’s because they were having beef kabobs. Everyone got burnt except me so I went down by the pool in the shade and K eventually joined me as we waited for the neighbs to come home. Finally we saw the bikes roll off the dock and knew they’d skipped the ride home. Steve came over and talked to K and me for a while and told us Martha had brought us some coconut empanadas – how sweet. Karen came over and we talked about AA and the bartender a few resorts down she made out with last time. We went up and got ready and went to MC’s, which as empty so we got the royal treatment and didn’t have to pay for dessert and Chels got her fish at the lower price. We stayed in there and laughed and talked for a while. Headed back home, sat on the porch and eventually Al came out and chatted with us and we talked about poop forever and showed him the poop log. Stu came out for a little while, but was too grossed out so he left. K went to bed and we all stayed up for a while then to bed.
Monday 5/18, Woke up just before 8 and Kass had slept 14 hours. We sat outside eating our breakfast then Chels got upset by something Kass said and it started all this morning drama, unfortunately. We decided to take the golf cart into town and started getting ready then found Chels and she wasn’t going to come so we took off for the 7 mile adventure. The ride was insane and now we all know why the staff thought it was so hilarious that we wanted to drive it. It took us about 45 minutes but we stopped 1.5 miles north of the bridge at Beach N Kitchen and had a little breakfast, each getting the breakfast burrito and sharing an order of French Toast – it was all delish. Back on the road we drove the rest of the way in and hit the gas station then made our way over to find the French Bakery where we each got a treat (apple turnover thing) then off to find the wine shop where Kass picked out a few South American reds and we vowed to be back for cheese. We kept driving south exploring and saw some fun places then turned around to go to Mambo Chill because I wanted to get a tunic to cover my burned shoulders and neck. Kass helped me pick a white one with some maroon stitching then found these cute headbands and we started trying a bunch on and I got 2 – a pink design and a yellow skull. Next we went to the jewelry shop and my ring was gone which I was semi-relieved about then over to Island Perk for a drink. I got a chocolate milk and we looked at some semi-cute guys at the bar and a lady with huge collagen lips. Back in the cart we went to the Greenhouse and did our shopping and they had a shitload of fruit and veggies. Some guy yelled at us “Charlie’s Angels!” as we drove away from him and we all laughed hysterically. Another fellow just asked us a string of questions, “Do you want to go to the beach? Do you want to have dinner? Would you like to have a drink? Do you want to come over to my house?” etc. He blew his proverbial load. We went back to the wine shop and Kass picked up the cheese and back on the road we went for home. The “road” was a little better because the water had mostly evaporated from the rain the night before. K had her legs up to tan and asked us to warn her if there were any people coming and after we passed 2 guys on the side of the road selling necklaces and said hi she was like “Thanks guys!” and we were like “Oops, sorry!” her “It looks like I’m birthing back here!” and Kass told her not to worry because those same guys had seen Chels peeing on the side of the road the day prior. We made it back and unloaded all our stuff and got ready to hit the pool. Karen and Steve and later Kathy, all came down to talk to us. We hung for a long time then I think I checked my email and wrote to Eric and updated my status to “Everting curry!” then realized everyone would misinterpret it and think I was talking about my dinner or food preference or something. Back up at the casa Kass and Chels seemed to have made up and we all ended up out on the deck talking about poop FOREVER and I know the boys heard some of it but no one really cared. We talked about going out after dinner with them. We started making dinner: guac, salsa, chips, quesadillas with tomato, sour cream, butter and salt and pepper (from Mama Caribe’s), green peppers and onions. It was all really delicious and we all ate a ton including a bunch of baguette and brie. We put aged white cheddar and low fat regular cheddar on our meals and stuffed ourselves. We started cleaning up and noticed the lightening getting closer and closer and Duane walked by and told Chels “Good night to make a baby” and we all giggled. All of a sudden the storm was upon us, and we remembered our neighbors were down a few resorts playing pool, and we weren’t sure how they were getting home in that mess. The girls all disrobed and ran out onto the lanai and were getting soaked and Kass decided to take a shower (since the shower is mostly salt water) and was slipping and sliding all over the place. They were all laughing hysterically and letting all the rain and wind in, bah. I was a grinch and wanted to keep it dry in there. It wasn’t that bad. I was tired and started getting ready for bed and we all laid in the dark talking and all drifted off without bidding each other good night.
Sunday 5/17, Woke up at 7:50 – almost slept 12 hours. Very good sleep. We had some breakfast and decided to go on a walk down the beach. We saw crabs, lots of different fish and a couple beached manowars, ouch. We didn’t walk very far because the beach got garbage-y quickly, ick. Walked back and sat on the end of the dock and interrupted the couple trying to hump in the water. It was really nice sitting out there. A hammock would have been better. Into the office to check email and Kass was on schedule but couldn’t find Chels and was pissed – next email – she found her – on their way. Good. I asked the front desk guy about golf cart rentals and bakeries and grocery stores, and got the dl on all of it. Even a French bakery for Kass. We went and got the room all packed up and got ready to take the 10am water taxi in, but stopped to ask Anders to make sure to get the fridge stuff. He’s my favorite. We went out and boarded the boat and went in and headed to find the bakery. It was so fucking hot and K could feel sweat in her butt; me down my back. I was getting hungry and cranky and super hot so I was extremely upset when the bakery was closed (Sunday). We kept walking and tried to find Ruby’s and when we did it was a little disappointing and my donut was stale – K’s cinnamon roll was better. We kept walking and stopped in every place that was open to get the AC. We found a couple really good shops that ended up being owned by the same British woman (born in Italy, raised in UK, lived in LA for 10 years, moved to Belize). Mambo Chill was the best and I got some earring and vowed to come back with Kass. We went to a little jewelry place where I found some rings I loved but didn’t buy – specifically the white agate one. Next we went to this shop that was having a crazy sale and I got the cutest red and white polka dot bikini for like $18 and a pink long dress for quite a bit more. We went back across to Fido’s and had some lunch while checking out the cute real estate guy at the next table who I’d seen in the Cuban place earlier while walking down Front St. After we finished lunch we started walking down to the ferry terminal / dock and out of the Cuban place jumps and yelling is someone and I thought it was a local, but nope, it was Kass and Chels who had taken the plane over from Belize City and had already rented a golf cart, which I told her I didn’t know if it was a good idea or not. We went to the store and got a bunch of stuff then raced back to the dock where our taxi guy was and we told him what was up and gave Kass as much direction as I knew and we took the bags and groceries and headed to the taxi. Everyone on the boat was giving us a hard time so we told them what was going on and they all laughed. We got back and told Anders about our adventures and he gave us the key to our new room and we went and explored and marveled at the view – superb. We semi unpacked and went out to sit on our new lanai, beautiful. K went down to the beach and I waited upstairs outside and eventually saw them pull up with Anders in tow. We got them upstairs then we all trickled down to the pool and the couple next to us, who ended up not being a couple at all, asked us where we were from so we started talking to them and learned they were in the room next to us and there was a whole group of them: Stuart (we called him Stu or Stuey, even though no one else did), Steve, Al, Karen and Kathy. We all ended up in the pool talking and laughing and bonding. Karen and Kathy are sisters and 20 months apart, like us, and Karen was the older one. It was hard to keep the two sets of sisters straight. Soo funny. We stayed down there for a long time swimming and hang out and laughed when Stu dropped his chicken wing in the pool. Eventually we went back up to the room except Chels who was asleep by the pool and stayed that way for another hour or so, despite both groups of us yelling down to her from our decks. We got ready to get something to eat and went to Mama Caribe’s and the three of us all shared our dinners but K didn’t like hers – too sweet. Kass ordered the chocolate cake for dessert and we polished it off and went back to the room. It got dark shortly after so K and I went out on the lanai and played several rounds of the boy game and laughed at the results, especially Schuyler and all his sexual prowess. Eventually Chels woke up and was famished and asked if it was too late to get food and I said it was probably close to closing then looked at my watch and it was 7:30. 7 f-ing 30. We thought it was after 9. The waiter brought Chels’ food and we sat laughing while she ate then we saw our neighbors coming back from the bar and they started coming up on our stairs and were like “knock knock” and sat down (Stu & Steve) and we started talking and eventually Al joined in too. Chels was stuck with Stu most of the time while K and me chatted with the two other boys. Everyone was annoyed with Stu by the end. We had a good time overall and eventually called it a night by 10:30 and climbed into bed.
Saturday 5/16, Arrived and both of us were sooo tired. Found Starbucks and got drinks and chocolate cake. We wandered looking at all the places to eat and found our gate. Went back to get food and I found cheap veggie bagel and it was like $2 while all bad stuff was super $$. Only in Texas, I guess. K found some food then we sat at the gate and ate, waiting for our next flight and checking out the cute / aloof guy close to us. Finally boarded and I slept for most of the 2.5 hour flight. K sat next to the fat guy this time, heh. Walked off the tarmac through immigration, got bags, changed into slippers, through customs and out to the taxi waiting for us with a sign. Talked to the driver most the way there through Belize City to the ferry terminal; Belize City not that attractive from the route we took. Bought our tickets and waited watching 12 hours or some shit in the air conditioned terminal lobby then the loud guy came in and asked K about her bag and apparently one of her sunscreens exploded and leaked everywhere. Time to board, we lined up outside and the captain called down to us “You two – come up here!” and I was like “Us two?” and he said yes and again I was like “Us?” and him, “Yeah!” then the bitch who was trying to cut in front of us was like “Is there room for three?” and I was like “Beat it” but he allowed her to come up too. Damn. Then these irritating Americans came up too and I hated them and I think K took a picture of their buttcracks. Luckily we got the good seats. Off we went and it was so cool, took pictures and it was amazing. Loved it but totally got scorched. Arrived on Ambergris but our guy wasn’t there to meet us from Belize Legacy so we called and he arrived a minute later. He took our bags and took us to the store and we picked up a few things to eat then went to the BLR dock and loaded up. K and I strategized how to be first in line to check in. Off the boat and first in because I’m young and nimble and got it figured out and in 4C – Garden room with peek-a-boo view of the sea. We settled in and I discovered my cds and dvds were gone and I think someone at the airport stole them. We ate a little then decided to go lay out even though I was already burned from the ride in on my shoulders and neck. We grabbed our stuff and found a nice spot on the beach. I read and listened to my ipod and K fell asleep. We were out there for a while then decided to go back up and shower. At some point we checked our email and facebook after the power came back on (5pm). We asked the front desk if we could get a room with a view or upstairs room and they told us they could move us the next day and to just pack our things and they would get everything moved for us. So accommodating. We showered and got ready and decided to go to Mama Caribe’s and split a dinner and got the Achiote chicken with Belize spices; it was really good and we ate all of it. K was really out of it and it was hilarious. We got dessert and while we were waiting for it I was really out of it. We laughed. Dessert was delish (lemon meringue) and our waiter said we should go out but we were way too tired and had no way in; he said he’d make sure we could get a ride in on the staff run. V. sweet. We went back to the room and got ready for bed and put on Monster in Law and both did some reading and passed out by 8:30. Both slept like babies.
posted by Karrah at 10:44 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home