Tuesday 6/30, Eric was working late. When I got home I took out the dogs, filed, organized all my receipts and credit card statements going back to the beginning of the year, cleaned up the kitchen, and folded laundry. Eric got home at 9:45 and we talked for a long time in the dining room. About his progress, my mental state, our relationship, etc. I showered and got into bed, watched 10 minutes of friends, updated this, and went to bed.

Monday 6/29, I got home and was only there for 30 minutes or so before Eric took off to meet up with a friend to go to a meeting. He made me a salad for dinner. I called Susan and talked about wedding details, then fed the dogs, ate my salad, and took off to get some stuff at Super Supplements. At home I watched Far From the Madding Crowd clips, trailers and featurettes on tv, then texted Sos to set up a time to call but she called right away. We only talked for 20 minutes but I pretty much filled her in on everything. Bachelorette came on and I felt a sense of calm and satisfaction. Eric got home before 9. I watered the plants in the front yard then showered and into bed. Updated this and went to bed.

Sunday 6/28, I woke up early but ended up falling back asleep until 8:45. When I got up the house was super stuffy since all the windows were closed. I ate breakfast and started feeling down again so I laid down and started to fall back asleep. Eric took off for a meeting but was back in a half hour because he couldn’t find it. I decided to get up and start getting ready for my lunch with Stef. I took off a little early in case I had trouble finding it or parking. I got to the Bistro at the Hollywood Schoolhouse (?) a few minutes before Stef did. We ordered and sat outside. It was overcast and had rained a little overnight. I filled her in on everything going on with Eric then she filled me in on what she wanted to talk about. Relationship stuff. We were there for a long time, then said goodbye, and headed home. Eric was there. We sat on the couch for a little bit watching some random show. Soon we took off for Tukwila to go see Far From the Madding Crowd. It was over by 6:30. It was very good; I really loved it. Back at home, Eric called Jim while I fed the dogs. I put the pizza in the oven then Eric finished it off. We ate dinner then went to the store. Back at home I did some research about my new favorite movie and got into bed.

Saturday 6/27, Eric was off to work early but I ended up getting up around 7:00 anyway. Fed the dogs, went for a walk at the park (the first exercise I’ve had in 3.5 weeks), walked the dogs around the neighborhood, trimmed the roses in the front yard, then laid down. I felt tired so I fell asleep for a few hours. I got up and went over to Mom’s to help load up a couple windows, but we could only take one. Talked to Mom and Dad for a little bit then went home. It was too late for me to see the movie I wanted to see (Far from the Madding Crowd) especially since Eric ditched me to go to a meeting and meetup. I didn’t feel great, kind of depressed, so I laid down and took another nap. Eric got me food for dinner but I decided to go see another movie so I didn’t eat it. I went down to Renton / Tukwila to see Age of Adeline. I liked it and the imagery was very pleasing. When I was driving home I started feeling sad again and started crying. I pretty much cried all the way home. In addition to just feeling overwhelmed and sad I started thinking about Keith. Turns out the following day marked the one-year anniversary of his funeral. I got home around 9:30 and Eric still wasn’t home. I got into bed and he arrived maybe 45 minutes later. He came in to talk to me and I started crying again, and on and off for the next 30 minutes. He sat with me and talked to me and wants me to see a therapist. I just wish I could be a kid again and have my Dad take care of me. Being an adult feels too overwhelming and dissatisfying. I just want to be taken care of. It was like 11 and I was exhausted, despite two naps. Eric said goodnight and I went to bed. Slept like a rock.

Friday 6/26, I felt good leaving work and the weather was nice, but hot. Eric went to a meeting and was gone pretty much all night. I did stuff around the house and relaxed. I think I watered some of the plants. I think I went to bed early.

Thursday 6/25, I got off a little early and Eric was home when I got there. We sat and talked for a while and he had tried to pay off some debt but it didn’t happen how it should have. I printed some articles for him to look at and go over. I worked for a little bit then Eric left for a meeting. I had dinner, then talked to Mom, and watered the backyard and patio in the front. I finished up my work and Eric came home. Got ready for bed and talked to Eric for a while until it was lights out.

Wednesday 6/24, Eric had a not so great day but it was better by the end. I went to Susan’s after work and we talked for a long time before starting X-Files. We got through two episodes and the second is a “to be continued”. I left around 7:45 and Eric was at a meeting when I got home. I ate something, cleaned up the kitchen, then sat down to work for a little bit. When Eric got home we went over his finances and things aren’t so bad. We talked about how he’s feeling and our respective days, then I showered and got into bed. Updated this and watched Friends.

Tuesday 6/23, Had a work meeting that went okay but P isn’t thrilled to have them as a client. Eric was working then had a meetup and a meeting so I was on my own for the evening. I stopped at the store on the way home. I took out the dogs, got them settled and then worked on bills in the dining room. I made a call to a lab that sent me a letter and got that squared away. I had dinner and put on Bachelorette, which was the highlight of my night. After it was over I showered and watered the front yard. Eric came home and had had a really good day for the first time since all this happened. I asked if he wanted to take the dogs on a walk so we leashed up the pups and I put Brizo in the sling and we did a little tour around the neighborhood. At home I got into bed and Eric talked to me about the prior evening, his day, let me read his journal, and plans for work. I updated this because I was super behind.

Monday 6/22, I rushed home to take care of the dogs and change my clothes for dinner at Brass Tacks for Mom’s birthday. I swung by MI to pick up Eric and we made it to Georgetown right as Kass, Mom, and Dad did. BT is closed on Mondays so it was just us and Sky decorated with balloons, streamers, confetti, and hired a piano player. There was so much food I felt so sick when I was done. Everything was amazing. Eric and I took off, stopped to pick up dog food and his car, then home. At home I took out the dogs and I opened up all the windows and doors. Mom and Dad arrived and Eric talked to Mom while I tried to wear out Martin and talked to Dad outside. Dad and I got ready for bed while Eric kept Mom up for a while talking. He came in briefly after Mom turned in but I was so tired I couldn’t stay awake to hear how it went.

Sunday 6/21, We were up early once again and Eric went to an early morning meeting at 7. I watered the plants and did some cleaning up in preparation of Dad coming for a couple days. We got ready to go to Mom’s for brunch for Father’s Day and we stopped at the store on the way there to pick up drinks. Father’s Day was good and the food was good. We stayed and talked until after 1 then took off, stopping at Mud Bay to get some bullies for the dogs. Stopped at the store to pick up stuff for dinner then home. Dad arrived about 30 minutes later and brought me a new hose. Eric sat Dad down right away to tell him and get it over with. Dad reacted how I figured he would. He didn’t beat him up, just told him it would be okay and to work on it. After that we went around the house going over projects: sprinkler system, hose bibs, electrical for outdoor stuff, and moving kitchen cabinets around. Kass and Sky arrived early and Kass brought an awesome mid-century light for me and sold it to me for $60. We set up shop out on the deck and played Mexican Train. I won the first game and then we started dinner. We ate, cleared the table, then played another game. I won again. I like that game! The third game I did not win, but I was really close. We packed stuff up and they took off. We were tired and got ready for bed. Said good night to Dad and Eric came in the bedroom with me to talk about the day. He was feeling anxious during dinner and unsettled by Dad’s response. He said it’s like he wants to be punished, but knows how fucked up that is.

Saturday 6/20, We were up early because the dogs refuse to let us sleep in. I dropped off my car to have it serviced and hung out at home for the day. I wanted to do some cleaning but ended up not doing much except some laundry. I went through some magazines while Eric went to a meeting. My car was finished so we went down to pick it up and he took off for work on his bike when I got home. I took a multi-hour nap, fed the dogs, then went over to Susan’s for dinner and X-Files. We went to Trader Joe’s where I got some sugary snacks, then to the gyro place which was closed until 7:00. We went up to her place where we watched an episode about the Rain Man. We went back to the gyro place, I got some food and we went back up and watched another episode where Skinner almost dies (that Krycek!). I left to go pick up Eric from work and we talked on the way home. I stayed up late and watched a little SNL though Eric went to bed early since he got up early and didn’t get a nap.

Friday 6/19, I had a wonderful dream about RG. I was being chased by two Doberman and I climbed up a chain link fence to get away, but then got stranded because there was one on each side. There was a restaurant right there and a bunch of my family was sitting there, including AL who loves Dobies, but no one would come out to help. Finally RG comes out and manages to get the dogs to go away, though I don’t remember how. I finally could come down. RG was my hero. I woke up euphoric. Eric was at a meeting or something so I called Mom and wished her a happy birthday and maybe I watered the plants. I really don’t remember. I think I watched a Dateline or 48 Hours show. Dex had been dropped off in the afternoon.

Thursday 6/18, I beat Eric home and sat with the dogs in the backyard. Eric came home and we talked for a little while in the dining room then went to the store. I made myself some dinner and Eric took off for a meeting. I vacuumed then worked and watched Dateline. We watched Aquarius and Eric was surprised he didn’t hate it. I showered and got into bed.

Wednesday 6/17, It was a better day. When I got home I felt down about his medical bills. I cleaned my shower and Eric came in and talked to me while I did it. He made dinner and I left for my 8 pm massage with Corey. The new space is really nice. The massage was a little painful, per my request, and we did some talking. I called Dad on the way home and filled him in. He’s going to come on Sunday afternoon. I gave Eric an update on my massage then we went to bed.

Tuesday 6/16, Eric had a not good day. First a panic attack at a meeting then a long day back at work where his anxiety was really high all day. He called me on his lunchbreak and he was crying. I told him it was going to be okay. I talked to Mom and got pretty worked up about everything and how mad I was at the position he put me in and where we are at this point in our relationship. When he got home I let him have it and that took the anxiety up another notch and the crying and panic started again. I calmed down and we talked and he felt a little better but he had to take another dose of his meds. We went to bed since it was late. What a fucking nightmare.

Monday 6/15, Eric had his first counseling appointment and he filled me in after it was over. It went well which helped his state of mind since he was quite nervous beforehand. I was so exhausted after lunch that I actually fell asleep for over an hour. Oops. I felt a little down as I left work, but that’s usually how I feel after napping in the afternoon. At home I told Eric how I was feeling and we had several conversations throughout the evening and things are good, just trying to stay supportive of each other. I sat outside in the shade and looked at some magazines then inside where I kept Eric company while he made me an omelet for dinner. I showered and got in bed, ready for Bachelorette. I took care of some emails and cleared out my inbox.

Sunday 6/14, Talked to Chrystol in the evening. She just wanted to tell me that her and Sky support me no matter what decision I make. I have no idea what else. I know Eric had a good day. Other than that, no clue.

Saturday 6/13, Eric’s plan was to talk to Mom that day so he was stressed. He started writing early in the morning and did for a long time. Mom came over and we sat down and Eric went over everything and Mom stayed for quite a while. He felt better afterward. She said she had a feeling and had figured out some of it. We talked forever. She asked who he was the most nervous to talk to, and he said Sky and Chrystol. After she left he went out in the yard and I think I did stuff around the house. Eric told me Sky and Chrystol were coming over to drop something off. He didn’t want to tell them but I told him I thought he should. They arrived and brought us dinner. We sat them down and Eric told them everything. There were some tears but a lot of understanding. Mom called so I went out to talk to her for a little bit then back inside. Chrystol was in the kitchen so I went and hung with her and filled her in on some of the other stuff that she had questions about. They took off a little after 8 and we ate some of the quiche and salad they brought (both excellent). Eric had felt good earlier in the day and wanted to get a DQ treat so we went down there and each got a blizzard. We had a nice time and cracked up at the music playing. On the way home Chrystol called and said she wanted to talk to me privately and that we’d talk the next day. When we got home I relaxed and ended up going to bed early.

Friday 6/12, Another good night’s sleep and he was so tired in the morning he didn’t want to get out of bed. Thank goodness. I made him get up and ready and wanted him to go with me to work one more time. Had a good day and he was able to drive to Whole Foods for lunch for himself (he hadn’t driven in a week because of the panic and anxiety) and after we got home he drove down to get himself a haircut. We went to pick up a pizza for dinner and watched Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead. Eric started falling asleep toward the end and we went to bed early once again. Probably around 10, maybe a little earlier.

Thursday 6/11, I went into his room at 7, expecting the worse, and thankfully was surprised that he’d had a good night’s sleep and was still tired. He felt okay and wasn’t anxious. I instantly felt better. I got ready for work and he was going to go to work with me again so he got ready and off we went. Better day, all day. Unfortunately that evening we had another meetup for Martin down in Federal Way. Eric didn’t want to go but I told him I really needed him like he needs me right now. He went with me and I kept him distracted by asking sports questions and he did a lot of reminiscing. The visit went really well and made a lot of progress with Martin and Petey. I was hopeful, but the next day June let me know she didn’t want to move forward. When I got home I wrote to everyone about the visit and they all gave me excellent feedback. I scrounged for dinner and we both went to bed early again since we were exhausted.

Wednesday 6/10, Eric woke me up in the middle of the night and was manic again. I couldn’t sleep from about 1:00 am until 5:00 ish. It was awful. My stomach was in knots and I was anxious that we’d never get him calmed down. The meds were supposed to keep him calm for 24 hours and they didn’t even work for 5 hours. He called the doctor first thing and got an 8:15 appointment. We were really early because he was anxious to get down there. We had the same nurse but a different doctor. We went through everything again and the dr put him on a different anti-anxiety that the other doctor wanted to use as a last resort. We went straight to have it filled and Eric made a counseling appointment while I was inside dropping it off. We walked over to the memorial park while the rx was being filled and Eric just broke down, sobbing frantically and told me he had to tell me something and that he was so sorry and so scared. Totally manic. He told me he never finished school and hasn’t been working at Lakeside. I just kept telling him it was okay. He was bawling and collapsed on the ground. My only goal was to get him calmed down and reassure him. After 20 minutes or so he was collected and we went back to get the script. We went home and sat in the backyard where he confessed everything and I asked question after question. I wasn’t happy, but I’ve always known something was going on but didn’t know what. Now I knew. He got a lot of stuff out and I felt better because I no longer felt like I was crazy for always being so paranoid. It also explains the money issues. Anyway, I told him I needed to go into work and at least check in. We took a walk when we got there and he was feeling super tired from the meds but the doctor told him not to sleep. I checked on work stuff and it was unusually dead. We left and went home. He laid down and I put on Your Highness. He lightly slept for a little bit then got up and went in the living room. I fell asleep and when I woke up he’d gone for a walk and had just returned. He was manic again. Afraid he was going to hurt himself, he doesn’t want to live like this, he’s so scared, etc. He called the doctor and thankfully he told him to take another one. Eric asked if we could call Mom and ask her to come over. She helped us devise a plan for the meds and to basically take them throughout the day rather than a couple in the morning and a couple in the evening. Things calmed down a little but he was still freaked out. Mom was over for three hours and she is a lifesaver. Dad called to check on me while she was over and I broke down telling him I was so exhausted and drained. I was just waiting for the next manic episode to crop up. The rest of the night went okay. He took his pills and went to bed earlyish. I woke up in the middle of the night terrified that he was going to be manic again in the morning. Anxiety was through the roof for me.

Tuesday 6/9, The day started out not good and Eric was a mess from the time he woke up. He wanted to go to work with me again so off we went and on the way he told me quit his job the prior week and was too scared to tell me. Also, he has a whole bunch of debt from something super trivial but has grown to an insane bill over the last five years. I told him it would be okay and we’d work through it. He was such a wreck he basically spent the entire day, except maybe about an hour total, having panic attacks and crying. It was an awful day. I spent a lot of the day on the floor with him telling him he would be okay, wasn’t going to die, and that his heartbeat was normal. We managed to get him an appointment for later that day rather than the next day. I emailed Janell to see if there was anyone else who could take Gus because things were not great for Eric at the moment. She said they could take him and I was so grateful. We made plans for me to meet Troy that night at 8. We had to go home first to let out the dogs and feed them, then headed out for his appointment. He was fine until we got close then he got depressed. The appointment went well and he showed her the range of his emotional state. She prescribed two meds and gave him a bunch of exercises to do regularly. We went to the store to drop off his rx, then home quickly to let out the dogs again, and pack up Gus and all of his things. We stopped at the store, picked up the two rxs, he took the one, and we head down to Tukwila to meet Troy. By the time we got there he was relaxing and actually laughing. What a relief. What a day. We did the handoff of Gus then got Eric a burger since he hadn’t eaten for the past 2.5 days. Back at home he got into bed and I did a few things around the house and sent off texts to let everyone know things were better. I talked to Jojo’s person and he was very sweet and told us if we ever needed anything to let him know and that anyone who takes that good of care of Jojo is important to them. I teared up on the phone and thanked him. When I went inside Eric was starting to doze off so I took some of the dogs out to the living room and updated this, watched tv, and sent off emails.

Monday 6/8, Eric stayed home from work and was not doing well at all. I told him to call Mom and he went for a walk as I left. Things were not good and he called mid-morning crying and having a panic attack. Mom talked to him for over an hour and I told him I’d go pick him up and he could spend the rest of the day with me at work since P was out of the country on vacation. The rest of the day went better with minimal anxiety. At home it was just more managing of Eric’s emotions. I watched Bachelor and he fell asleep early; though he woke up and had a restless rest of the night’s sleep.

Sunday 6/7, When we woke up Eric was having some issues and was feeling anxious and panicked. He hadn’t gotten much sleep which wasn’t good. He went inside and was pretty stoic. I had pancakes for breakfast then we went upstairs to get ready. He started freaking out and said he needed to leave and we needed to go home. I told him we needed to tell Dad so we walked down to the river where he was. There was a snake in the water. Eric told Dad that he was having a panic attack and had been having anxiety for the past week and it was flaring up again. Dad gave him a hug and told him it would be okay and that if he needed anything that he’s there for him. We packed up our stuff and got on the road. He was better the closer we got to home. When we arrived he relaxed and was feeling better for most of the day. I had to go down to Tukwila to pick up our new foster, Gus. He was so cute and seemingly laid back. When we got home we did introductions and Martin behaved himself and wanted to play so bad. He was a little rough so we kept a close eye on them to make sure Gus was okay. I spent part of the evening watering the plants in the backyard and had Gus with me. He wanted to bite the water spray so I put it down by him and he walked through it and put his face in it. He loved it. When I wouldn’t spray him he would cry and bark at me. So funny. Later in the evening Eric was feeling not so great so he slept in the bedroom with me and all the dogs. It was not really restful.

Saturday 6/6, We were up around 8:30 and went into the motorhome where Dad was having a pancake. He made me a couple and we watched some racing qualifying thing in Toronto. I went up to get ready and when I was done it was time for us to head into Wenatchee. We drove in and talked the entire way. We parked and went into my favorite furniture store and there was so much mid-century furniture and it was all so inexpensive that I had a hard time choosing what I wanted to buy. I told Dad and Eric I needed to think about it and that we should get lunch across the street at Lemolo. Eric and I split a turkey and avocado sandwich then we went back over and I bought a chair that needed to be recovered and a magazine rack. I asked the gals if they knew anyone who reupholsters and they gave me the name of a guy outside town. I called and he said I could come over and bring the chair. We found the place and met Larry. He was quite a character. Eric and I picked out a fabric for the chair then Larry wanted to show us around the place and it was pretty spectacular. Nice property with a lot of stuff to look at and some pick-y items I thought Kass would like. Eric started to have a panic attack so we walked back to the car and he got in while Dad and I thanked him and said bye. We stopped at Costco for gas then headed back to the property. We decided we were going to grill at home and relax for the evening. When we got home Eric and I laid down and rested for a few hours. When we got into the motorhome Dad was making dinner and we watched Pawn Stars. We talked until 10 or so then turned in since we were all sleepy. Unfortunately Eric did not get a good night’s sleep.

Friday 6/5, P let me leave early so I headed home and got started on chores and finished packing. I cleaned stuff up and had quite a bit done by the time Eric got home. We waited for Michelle to arrive to meet Martin and go over everything then took off for Plain. We stopped in Monroe and ate at DQ. I was very hungry and ate all of my four chicken tenders. Back on the road, but not for long: Sultan Bakery was next and I got a cookie, though I couldn’t eat it all. We made it to the property and it was still light. They repaved the whole road all the way to the gravel. Dad came out to meet us and we all went into the motorhome to talk and relax. We stayed up until around midnight then we went upstairs and went to bed.

Thursday 6/4, When I got home I quickly ate something then we took off to go do another meetup for Martin and brought Clancy. The meetup went better than the one on Monday but we still didn’t get to where I was hoping we’d be. Martin is very reactive though the trainer friend was able to get him close to Petey as long as Petey wasn’t moving around. We left at 7:40 and let Jojo’s person know we’d be home at 8:00 for pickup. After she went home I had something to eat then showered, filled in the ladies about Martin’s meetup, and watched Mulder’s new show.

Wednesday 6/3, I was super tired on the way home but I knew we needed to do Marty’s microchip when I got home. We packed him up and went down to the vet and I could hear him crying from out in the waiting area. We went home and I played with him out in the backyard and that put him in a better mood. Eric started dinner and I went in the bedroom and shut the door for some alone time. I talked to Dad about going over to Plain for the weekend and asked Michelle if she could dog sit over the weekend. We ate dinner and watched tv until 9. I showered and we took out all the dogs, then into bed.

Tuesday 6/2, Jojo was dropped off in the morning. After work I knew I needed to work out since it had been over a week since I last had a proper workout. Eric went with me and we ran at the park and did 2.5 times around. I had to walk at the end because I was so exhausted. When we got home I showered and we took off for Costco where we got mostly veggies and a pizza for dinner. I was so hungry I ended up eating two big pieces, then some chocolate. I didn’t feel great after that but that pizza was good. I watched Bachelorette in the living room and went to bed by 10:30.

Monday 6/1, When I got home Eric was busy getting everything ready for Martin’s home visit. I was expecting it to go off without a hitch but unfortunately the resident dog, Petey, was so jacked up and excited to meet Martin that Martin became reactive and wanted nothing to do with Petey. The sister of the applicant picked up Petey to let Martin smell his butt and Martin bit poor Petey’s butt. What a cheap shot. We couldn’t believe it. We were there for almost two hours and never got them to do proper introductions. I was disappointed when we left but Eric tried to give me a pep talk. At home I sent out emails letting everyone know it didn’t go well. We decided to try again on Thursday at a neutral location in Tukwila. When we got home I got ready for bed and crashed early.

Sunday 5/31, I was up around 8:00 and Susan arrived a little while later. We talked for a long time then watched two episodes, including the haunted house one and the devil / baby / I’m Only Happy When it Rains one. I was tired after she left but went outside and cut peonies and deadheaded one of the rhodies. Back inside Eric got ready to go meet up with Alan for the Sounders’ game and instead of being active and moving around I succumbed to my tiredness and laid down. I put on Eternal Sunshine and fell asleep about 30 minutes in and didn’t wake up until after the credits had rolled. I put it back on and watched to the end. Eric came home right after that. I was feeling blah and he was worried and tried to cheer me up. We went to try to get cards for bdays, graduations, and weddings but the mall was closed. We went to the store to get some veggies. We took a mini drive so we could check out some little pocket neighborhoods that I’ve been curious about for a while. We went home and I had some pasta for dinner then Eric helped me change the sheets on the bed. I was tired so I got into bed and went to sleep early.

Saturday 5/30, We were up early to prepare for the big baby shower party that day. I cleaned, got things ready, and went up to the French Bakery for the blueberry breakfast cake. Eric had some anxiety but we both relaxed when we found out only the old crew was coming. Jen arrived and started setting up and soon Brandon and his gf, Carla, arrived and started helping as well. Jason had something else and missed the party. Chrystol and Sky were the last to arrive and we got going on celebrating and eating. We sat on the back deck because the weather was so beautiful. We talked and ate and Brandon’s gf announced that they’re engaged. Hilarious! At my house. So funny. We played a couple games and found a metal folding table under the house. Brandon and Carla were the first to take off and we started the clean up. Jen had other plans so she got her stuff together and took off and it was about 3. Chrystol and Sky stayed and we sat on the couch and just talked until I suggested they just stay for dinner and Eric could make the orzo salad. We went for a walk at the park and brought the dogs then home where I took off for the store and Sky and Chrystol went to Whole Foods for dates. We had dinner and watched some Chatty Man. I talked to Dad for a few minutes about the following weekend in Plain. Sky and Chrystol took off around 8:00 and by 9:00 I was fast asleep. I felt good all day but was exhausted.

Friday 5/29, I was feeling much better than the prior two days. The weather was gorgeous again and I drove with the windows down and sunroof open. Eric was cleaning when I got home and there was a lot to do so I changed and got down to business. We worked for a while then took off to run errands. We went to Cost Plus so I could get soap, chocolate, and fun drinks for the Sky and Chrystol’s baby shower. We went to the store, picked up a pizza for dinner, and headed home. Eric made dinner and we watched Frasier. We went to Dairy Queen for a sweet treat. I showered when we got home and updated this. I had the bedroom door open because it was so nice outside and wanted to cool off the bedroom.

Thursday 5/28, I was super tired again in the morning and told P and she understood and we talked a lot about depression and anxiety and “not good enough” and all that. I felt more normal around noon which was an improvement from the prior day. When I got home I had plans to just lie on the back deck in the sun and not worry about anything else. When I got home I put on my suit and sat outside. It felt so wonderful. Eric and I talked and all the dogs milled around and wanted to sit in my lap. Eric started dinner and we went inside. Eric was still feeling under the weather, but better. We watched a ton of Chatty Man episodes which are always good for a laugh. We went to bed by 10:30. I took my meds with dinner hoping to decrease the tiredness the next day.

Wednesday 5/27, Eric called me at work and told me he wasn’t feeling good and was staying home from work. I felt so tired and groggy / foggy all day. I chalked it up to my meds. It was a bit of a slog until about 3:00. When I got home Eric was having a hard time and was having a panic attack like his old days and was pretty worked up. I mostly listened to him for a long time because talking seemed to make him feel a little better. I told him I was going to take the dogs around the block so he went with me. While we were walking Shelly called to give me the results of my tests and everything was good. I asked her if I could just stay on ½ a pill instead of going up to 1 and she said yes. I changed and Martin’s applicants came over to meet him and it went very well. Hoping this one works out. After they left I ate dinner and he was feeling a little bit better. We spent the evening together and he decided to sleep in the bedroom with me so it was the two of us and all four dogs on the bed. It was a little crowded.

Tuesday 5/26, I only worked a half day so I could meet up with Kass and Auntie Lauryn for lunch. We met at Stateside and had a delightful lunch. We went to Kassie’s apartment after so she could pick up Tahini for his chemo. AL and I went back to our house and she fell asleep on the ride over since she hadn’t slept at all the prior night. Eric was home so we sat and talked in the living room until it was time to take off for the airport. AL was flying home as she’d been in CA for several weeks and then in Alaska with George. On the way home Eric had me drive because he wasn’t feeling well and appeared to be having some kind of anxiety issue but he said he wasn’t feeling well and was nauseous. When we got home I went outside with the dogs and when I went back in he was in his bedroom. I closed the door and took the dogs in with me to let him rest. I relaxed and eventually ate a little something for dinner since I wasn’t that hungry and Eric was not up for making dinner. I watched Bachelorette and went to bed right after.

Monday 5/25, I was up around 7:00 after waking up at 2:00 am and not being able to sleep for an hour or so. I went for a run and made it home by 8:30. Susan arrived after 9:00 and Eric made us breakfast while we watched X-Files. We got through three episodes with one of them being the bad Triangle. Susan left and I used the shop vac to do some clean up in the pool room. I sat down on the couch and started to do some work but dozed off, woke up, worked some more, dozed off, then Rio’s people arrived to pick her up. I put on Austenland and finished my work. I talked Eric into taking a walk at the park with the dogs and Martin was much more confident with the other dogs and / or Eric along. At home I dead-headed the rhody in the backyard then did some more work while Eric made dinner. We ate dinner and watched WoF then I answered some rescue emails.

Sunday 5/24, I had Martin sleep in the bed with me which allowed me to sleep until after 7:00. Hooray! We got up and started pretty early with getting the plants figured out. We moved four of the planters to the back deck and moved all the plants back there. We ran up to Ace for pea gravel then home to get everything in. We worked on getting the containers filled and plants situated. Eric mowed the lawn while I ate lunch. I went out and planted my dahlias (seven new ones) then showered. We went to Office Depot and Silver Platters (new location) where I got a couple old Elliott Smith albums and the new Decemberists’ album. We went up to Crossroads so Eric could go to the French Bakery for coffee then the GO. When we got home Mom arrived because she wanted to go over plans for the pool room. She’s got ideas for days so I had to wrangle her in.  She took off and I did some stuff in the bedroom for a while. Eric and I messed around and I got into bed shortly after. I didn’t stay up late because I was tired.

Saturday 5/23, I was up super early because the dogs didn’t want to let me sleep in. I got ready for my run and did three miles, running the whole thing. That felt good. Eric went to do a dump run for Mom but the transfer station was temporarily non-operational so he came home. We waited for Rio to be dropped off then took off for the store so Eric could get a coffee and I dropped off my rx. We went to T&L and got a bunch of plants (poppies, daphne maejima / Lawrence Crocker, thymus alba, several canna, and a bunch of geums) then back home where I wrote Martin’s bio and sent it off. I went to the store to pick up my rx and back home. I took Martin on a walk at the park and he didn’t do great and was very nervous. We took the shortcut home. We hung out for the evening and I managed to stay awake until SNL but fell asleep shortly after it started.

Friday 5/22, I had my annual and also got a prescription for Zoloft while I was there. Good times. Eric was helping Mom with something after work so I got home and took the dogs out then took Martin on a walk in an attempt to get some of his energy out. I fed the dogs and Eric arrived home shortly after. We got an app for Martin so I was dreading writing his long bio but checked in all night to see if I was going to have to start that evening. I didn’t. I spent time in the kitchen with Eric while he made dinner and showed him the plants I had in mind for our trip to T&L the next day. I think we just relaxed for the rest of the evening.

Thursday 5/21, I got off work early so I went and picked up my cushions for the living room chair and went home. When Eric got home we went to the store to get stuff for dinner. Susan came over and we talked for a little bit then started Season 6 of X-Files. We got through the first two episodes and had dinner to boot. After she left I showered and got ready for bed. I had an early appointment the next morning so I went to bed early.

Wednesday 5/20, I went for a run when I got home but I was tired and sluggish so I only did two miles instead of the intended three. Eric had dinner ready when I got home and had already taken Martin on a walk. Watched tv and relaxed for the evening before going to bed early.

Tuesday 5/19, When I got home Eric had already taken Martin for a walk and was cleaning so I put on my workout gear and took off to go for a run at the park. I did 3+ and ran most of it. I was so hot and sweaty by the time I got home. Eric was making dinner so I took the dogs outside and brushed all their teeth and cleaned Martin’s ears again. Got an email from Janell and it sounds like Gus won’t come up until June 7th, which is fine with us. We ate dinner in the living room and watched WoF. I showered and got into bed in preparation for Bachelorette and DwtS finale. Took care of some foster stuff and did stuff online. Went to bed late again.

Monday 5/18, When I got home Eric wasn’t feeling good but we took the dogs on a walk anyway. Martin had so much energy so I took him over to the park to walk around the lake but he was fairly anxious about half way through so we took a shortcut and headed back home. Eric fed the dogs while I went to the store to grab veggies and stuff for the week. I got some free mushrooms, I think because I smiled at the cashier and asked him how he was. The girl that was bagging was like, to him, “You’re funny”. Busted. Dinner was ready when I got home and we watched WoF and ate. I scanned and emailed all of Martin’s medical paperwork then got the foster parent agreement squared away. Watched DwtS, worked on foster stuff, watched Bachelor and did some work. Went to bed too late.

Sunday 5/17, Eric got up with the dogs and I got up at 7:30. I went for a run and did 3+ miles. There was some bad graffiti down the street so Eric went down to take pictures to submit to the city and talked to the family that was targeted. I cleaned my shower then washed up and got dressed. I was tired so I laid down, read, and eventually took a little nap until Rio’s people arrived and picked her up. We went to the GO to pick up a few things and back home. I went out in the yard and worked on the rhodies. We left to go meet the transport to pick up Martin. He was super sweet and good natured. Everyone on the transport loved him. Back at home we went in the backyard so all the dogs could get acclimated and run around. We bathed Martin and cleaned up his ears, flea treatment, tick check, all that. He had tons of energy so I took him on a walk and he did pretty well. I spent some time reading and eventually Eric took Martin because he was all wound up. I watched Layer Cake (Tom Hardy), paid bills, looked at stuff online, updated this, etc.

Saturday 5/16, Up early, of course. Eric was getting the truck all squared away while I got dressed. We walked up to the store so I could get milk and he could get coffee. Back at home I had breakfast then I talked to Mom for a long time because her and Dad are having some issues so she asked me to call him and talk to him. I had other stuff to do first so I got started out in the yard, including planting a couple geraniums Peggy was going to toss, and moving some blue grasses to the backyard. Eric went and picked up a truck load full of topsoil for the beds. We spread the topsoil for over an hour then Rio was dropped off. We finished up and went over to Mom’s to pick up the window from their bathroom. We talked and she showed us the bathroom project and plans. We went home, unloaded the window, then took off to run errands: Super Supplements, Cost Plus for chocolate and root beer, then QFC to get stuff for Eric to make patty melts for dinner. I called Dad and we talked for a while and he said he felt better and was in a good mood. Fingers crossed. I watched Wet Hot American Summer and took a nap. I got up when Eric started dinner. I spent time in the backyard watering the new soil in until dinner was ready. We watched a couple shows then I watched Crazy Stupid Love because I was bored. To stay awake until SNL I watched Tom Hardy interviews online. New crush. I watched most of SNL but wasn’t that impressed. Went to bed after 1:00.

Friday 5/15, I needed to work out but didn’t want to. I talked Eric into taking a walk around the park with the dogs so that kind of sufficed. He wanted to do a semi-date night. I showered and we went to Dough Zone for dinner. The food was good and we’ll be back for sure. We went to Super Supplements so I could get dishwasher detergent. Back at home I realized I got the wrong detergent so I had to return it. We read a few chapters of the book we started last fall then watched an episode of House Hunters. I watched another one and he took off to go see a movie. I stayed up for a while then fell asleep. Eric came home late after I’d gone to sleep.

Thursday 5/14, I went and dropped off the cushions for my mid-century chair from Wenatchee to have the foam replaced. It was a long day at work and I was in no mood to work out so I went out in the yard to plant the roses instead. We got the dead twisty baby and magnolia out of the ground and put the roses in their place. Eric made dinner and we watched Family Feud which had one of the most hilarious answers to the question “What do women do after their husband goes to sleep?”. The third answer was “Fart / Major Dump”; Eric and I couldn’t stop laughing. I showered and got dressed then headed out for my massage with Corey. The lady before me was raving about the massage, signed up for the monthly plan, and said she was going to bring back her partner. I told Corey then mid-massage he asked if I was going to sign up for the monthly plan. We both cracked up. You had to be there. Har. I told Eric when I got home and he was mock laughing which made me laugh even harder. When I got home I felt incredibly relaxed and got ready for bed.

Wednesday 5/13, I had a nice dream about Robb Stangl*nd and that he liked a different girl, but she liked a different guy, who I happened to run into and he was super hot. Then he liked me. I have no idea who this guy was but I woke up in a good mood! At work P dug up some roses for me to take home, when I got there I put them in the backyard for planting. Susan arrived for our X-Files movie extravaganza. Eric made mac and cheese for us. I had a lot of questions but not many of them were answered. Susan left around 7:30. I showered and started laundry then hand washed delicates. Into bed and updated this. Busy day the next day.

Tuesday 5/12, I had a dream about Paul D*anielson and that I had a crush on him and he wanted to take me surfing and I was like, “Don’t you remember how that went last time?” implying he had tried to teach me to surf and it didn’t go well. Then he wanted to take me to do something else but I don’t remember what. I woke up with a little crush on Paul. If only my freshman self could see me now! After work I didn’t want to work out but forced myself to anyway. I only did 25 minutes but I kicked it up a level. We ate dinner and watched tv before my DwtS came on. After, I showered then into bed.

Monday 5/11, When I got home I jumped on the stair master and did 40 minutes. I fed the dogs then Eric and I went out in the yard while I transplanted two dahlias and a hydrangea. Inside I showered and we ate dinner. I watched DwtS and updated this. My arm still hurts from that shot the previous Wednesday.

Sunday 5/10, We were up by 7:00 but Eric took the dogs and dealt with them so I could stay in bed longer. Susan and I were supposed to watch the X-Files movie but she’d had a rough night so we rescheduled. I put on my gardening clothes and joined Eric out in the front yard and we worked and worked until about noon when I went inside to eat lunch. M and J arrived to pick up Dora and Elsa and we talked for a little bit. They brought us an Eames memory game with fantastic photography. After they left we went to Super Supplements but Eric noticed one of my tires was super low so we went and tried to figure that out then the store. Back at home I napped and felt blah when I got up. I went outside and called Mom to wish her a happy mother’s day then talked to dad for a while. When I got off the phone we went back outside so I could plant a pansy and we ended up talking to Cathy and Paul for a long time. I finished watering then back inside. I puttered around doing a few other things while Eric cooked dinner. We ate and I got into bed, updated this, and off to sleep.

Saturday 5/9, Eric had to work early so he was out of the house by 6:15 and rode his bike in. I was up about an hour later because the dogs wanted their breakfast. I got up and fed everyone then worked out for 40 minutes. I showered and got ready then waited for mom to let me know she was heading over. She had a tile guy appointment that ran late and then took forever. I started to fall asleep around 11 but she called about 20 minutes later. I rounded up all the dogs in the den and we took off for the Hollywood Tavern for what turned out to be lunch since breakfast was off the table. We had a nice lunch but ended up filling up on the ancho chile tater tots. She dropped me off at home and I put on my gardening clothes and hit the backyard. I trimmed some of the trees then Eric came home and I went inside. I took a nap and slept too long so I felt like garbage for a while. I decided to go out in the front yard and do some work and spent a few hours out there. That felt good and helped me wake up. The yard looked great. I watered everything in the front then went and did the same in the backyard. Eric made dinner and I may have just watched tv. I don’t remember. I stayed up for the first few sketches of SNL.

Friday 5/8, Traffic was bad so Susan came over after work to hang out. We spent some time in the backyard then went inside and talked in the living room. Eric went and got a pizza and we watched WoF and Jeopardy for old time’s sake. She took off at 8:00 so I jumped in the shower and got ready quickly. We took off for Kassie’s open house to showcase her stuff from her most recent buying trip. We arrived by 8:40 or so and looked at all the new stuff. Eric’s favorites were the black and white nude shots. Just kidding. Both our favorites are the falcon chairs. Eric liked the lamps and little bell ringing thing too. I talked to Alissa, JJ, Jason, Sky, Mom, Dad, a woman Mom brought whose name I can’t remember, and umm, I think that’s it. We stayed until after 10 and had a nice time. Kass might get a show that would be the best show yet, so my fingers are definitely crossed. We headed home, got stuck in a terrible traffic jam, and got into bed by 10:30.

Thursday 5/7, I was tired when I got home but we took all the dogs for a walk to work them out. We took a bunch of stuff to Goodwill then went to the GO for dinner provisions. Eric started dinner when we got home and I put away clothes. We trimmed the dogs’ nails and I watched Jeopardy. We ate dinner then put on Frasier and watched like 4 episodes. I started to fall asleep during the third episode. I took a shower then got into bed and updated this. Got my bloodwork results back and he said everything looks good.

Wednesday 5/6, When I got home I showered and got dressed, ate a few air puffs, and took off for my physical. I’ve never had one and it went well, even the blood draw and tetanus shot. When I got home Eric made me dinner and we watched Frasier. I fell asleep by 8:30 or so because I was exhausted. Eric woke me up and I got into bed.

Tuesday 5/5, When I got home I did 35 minutes on the stair master then ran a half mile. I moved some laundry around then showered. I washed a bunch of my delicates in Eric’s bathroom since it has two sinks so I could get a production line going. I ate dinner and we watched tv before I got into bed.

Monday 5/4, I got off work early and when I got home Jojo hadn’t yet been picked up so I took all the others out to the yard and Eric waited. Susan arrived and joined me in the backyard while Eric took care of business. We went inside and started the last two episodes of Season 5. The first was the praying mantis episode then smoker comes back and the little chess kid gets kidnapped and rats out Mulder with his ex. Eric made us dinner and it was good but a little spicy. We talked for a few minutes after we finished then she took off. Eric and I watched some tv then I went into the bedroom to watch DwtS and update this. Went to bed by 10:30.

Sunday 5/3, We were up early in order to take all three dogs down to Kent to have their teeth cleaned. Back home I went to the park and ran two times around then back home for some breakfast. I got ready then we headed up to the GO to get some stuff for dinner since Sky and Chrystol were coming over. We went over to Mom’s for Kass’ bday party and they were a little late but not too bad. It was a nice brunch and I had a very nice time. At 1 I called the vet to check on the status and they told us 3 for the pickup time. We went to the store on the way home and picked up the final items for dinner and the week. We picked up the dogs and Brizo and Nyx were out of it while Clancy was ready to rock and roll. At home we took out the dogs then I took them in the bedroom with me and I crashed. When I woke up I was super out of it. Eric made a delicious orzo salad and Sky and Chrystol arrived around 6:00. We sat outside and talked for a little bit then ate dinner. We moved into the living room and just talked and ate dessert. They left a little after 9:00 and we watched Last Man Alive. I went to bed not much later.

Saturday 5/2, I got up and started on my stair master and Eric headed out to work on his bike. I showered and got dressed then headed out of the house to PacGal for an auction. I ended up seeing Joe S (Poly) down there and talked to him for a long time. He won a weather vane and wanted to buy the Munsters piece. I was there for a table and chairs but it started higher than I wanted to go so I didn’t even bid. I stayed until 2:45-ish then took off for home but had to go south on 5 then north on 405 to avoid the 90 closure. The dogs were excited when I got home so we went out in the yard for a while. I did about an hour’s worth of yard work and cleaned out one of the garbage cans on the side of the house and put together a bag of Eric’s stuff for goodwill. Eric came home just as I sat down. He had stuff to make my favorite salad for dinner. We went to Cost Plus so I could get a couple little things for Kassie’s birthday party the next day then over to Belle Pastry where Eric got a coffee then back over to a neighborhood with mid-century houses that I wanted to show Eric. We picked out our favorites and shook our heads at all the ugly monstrosities that replaced older homes. We went home and I watched a terrible Lifetime movie then SNL but fell asleep about 30 minutes in.

Friday 5/1, When I got home I skipped my workout but spent a lot of time in the yard with all the dogs. I changed my clothes and we were off to try a new place, which was a Thai place (Crossroads). The service was terrible but the food was good. We decided next time we’ll try the dumpling place next door. We went down to the mall so I could get some new mascara then home. I watched some tv and went to bed.

Thursday 4/30, When I got home we cut the dogs’ nails and played out in the backyard. Three more of my dahlias are coming up so that’s good. We took the dogs on a quick walk, fed them, then Eric started dinner. I talked to Mom about Papa and he’s not doing well and it looks like lung cancer along with an aneurism on one of his arteries. We ate dinner then I showered and put on some clothes because Dora and Elsa were being dropped off. We chatted with M and J for a half hour or so then they left. We got into bed and I updated this.

Wednesday 4/29, I went to Susan’s after work and we caught up then watched two episodes of X-Files. One with quadruplets with four extra digits and the other where Mulder is part of a bio-weapon undercover plan that left us scratching our heads. I left around 7 and Eric had dinner ready for me when I got home. We went to the store at 8 and I showered when we got home. Eric is talking about getting his real estate license. I got into bed and puttered around online.

Tuesday 4/28, When I got home I did my workout right away and did 40 minutes. I hadn’t worked out in so long so I knew I needed to put in a real effort. I talked to Dad afterward to catch up then Eric let me know dinner was ready: French toast with potatoes. Carb fest. After dinner I showered and we watched DwtS anniversary episode. I got into bed and looked at real estate in Palm Springs and updated this.

Monday 4/27, It was a gorgeous day and I drove with the windows down all the way home. When I got home we took the dogs on a walk and when we got home I got my ING account all linked up then we had dinner outside. It was lovely. We went over to the park and walked one time around then home. We sat on the couch looking up stocks and watching tv. After DwtS I showered and got into bed. Eric took Jojo for the night.

Sunday 4/26, Eric woke me up to tell me he had to go into work for several hours for a meeting. I didn’t get up until after 8 and Mark and Kelly were up and relaxing in the living room. We got ready and we went over to Mom’s to see her place then swooped over to pick up Eric at work. We headed to Pike Place Market and did the usual up and down the walkway and took pictures and all that. We went to the ID and drove through then to the airport to drop them off. We had a great time and hope they come back soon. We went home and I watched My Week with Marilyn and then tried to take a nap. The woman who was watching Jojo called so we left to go pick her up on MI and back home. I think we just relaxed for the rest of the evening and I probably went to bed early.

Saturday 4/25, I got up not too early and we took our time getting ready. We went into downtown Bellevue to go to glassy baby and I wanted to get a special surprise for Eric for his 8-year sober date. Kelly got a glassy baby for herself and one for her mom then we went next door to Belle Pastry for some cinne-minis. We took off for Cost Plus but they didn’t have the big Virgil’s bottles so I got some backups and some other snacks instead. Kelly loved it and asked if they have them in MN and apparently they do. She was so excited. We took off for Issaquah to get some Thai but our favorite place was closed so we went to our runner up place. We drove up to Snoqualmie and took the scenic route. Kelly fell asleep for a few minutes but woke up when we got there. We took pictures and wandered around then into the lodge and gift shop. We drove home via North Bend and relaxed for the afternoon. Eric started dinner and I invited mom over to join us. We sat in the kitchen with Eric and when mom arrived she had all kinds of ideas for the kitchen. We had dinner (cilantro / lime pork) and it was excellent. Eric made brownies and we had gelato with them. Mom didn’t stay too late and Kelly and Mark spent much of the evening packing their bags. We all watched the Bruce Jenner special then went to bed kind of early.

Friday 4/24, We were all up pretty early which was not that great for me, but their time was two hours ahead so 7:00 felt late for them. We had some breakfast and all got ready then prepared for our day trip to Whidbey Island via Deception Pass. We stopped at Whole Foods on the way out of town and got some snacks and water. We drove up to Deception Pass and talked the entire way, specifically about motorhoming together in 5-7 years. We’ve got it all planned out. We got out at the Pass and took some pictures then kept going on our trip down Whidbey. We stopped in one of the towns to use the bathroom and get some onion rings, which Eric got for Kelly but she blew right past him to get some pop. We toured Coupeville and they thought it was very cute. Eventually we made it down to Langley and parked. We went to Prima for lunch and Eric wasn’t there despite him telling me he would be. He had been at Voracious or something the prior night and was late getting in. We had a nice lunch anyway and he ended up showing up at the end so I said hi and we talked for a minute before he had to get to work. We finished up and walked around town, stopping at the Star Store, the little antique store with Ruby the Pom / Peke mix, the coffee shop, a glass shop, and eventually back to the car. We drove around and looked for rabbits then over to the cemetery to see how creepy it was. We wrapped up the tour and headed for the ferry. On board we went up above and Mark was impressed with how nice it was. After the ferry ride we drove over to Mukilteo to see our old house then headed home. When we got home we all relaxed and watched tv until Eric started making dinner: enchiladas. We ate dinner in the living room and watched House Hunters Int’l but I’d seen most of them. We ended up all going to bed by 10.

Thursday 4/23, Eric woke me up at 3:00 am because Clancy needed to go to the vet. His face was much more swollen so we went down to Aerowood. Luckily we were out of there within 30 minutes. He got cortisone and antihistamine injections and $200 later we were on our way home. Next time we’ll do the Benadryl and save $199. I slept until almost 8:00 then got up and jamming on cleaning. I washed the floors in the whole house then showered and got ready. We quickly went grocery shopping then Kelly texted that they’d landed right on time at 10:30. We ran home and put everything away then sped down to the airport and picked up her and Mark. That was the beginning of a very fun four days with lots of laughing and talking. When we got home we showed them around and sat and talked for a little bit before setting out for the Hollywood Tavern for lunch. We got the tots to start and everyone was impressed. I got mac and cheese for lunch and it was just enough. I filled them in on the Alishia and Kassie drama. We went next door to the Whiskey distillery and Kelly bought two things of honey and a candle, while Mark did some tasting and bought a bottle. Next we went over to Chateau St. Michelle where we walked in and apparently crashed a private reserve club tasting event. Kelly did some tasting and we met a very nice gentleman named Eric. It was a lot of fun and we didn’t realize where we were and what we’d done until we were leaving and we saw the “private event” signs. We headed home where Kelly and I were interested in a nap. Mark napped on the couch. When we got up we all sat in the living room and talked for a while before we needed to get ready to meet up with Kass and Sky for dinner at Brass Tacks. We got down there around 7:30 and had a great dinner. We had a ton of food and it just kept coming and coming. I ate too much. Sky picked up the tab. We walked down to Kass’ shop so they could see the space. Kelly loved a little stool that Kass got in MN. We said our goodbyes then headed home and all got into bed. Fun day.

Wednesday 4/22, Dex and Pip went home before we went to work. After work I went home and started with chores, including laundry, getting the back room finished, mopped the floors in the bedrooms, hall, and main bath, and cleaned Eric’s bathroom. Eric had been out in the backyard and noticed Clancy was looking a little swollen from what was probably a bee sting, since he’s famous for that. I had a massage at 8 so I quickly ate dinner, showered, and headed out. I had Corey focus on my back and it was fantastic. We did some chatting about his summer schedule and the new space. Back at home I finished up Eric’s bathroom by getting the shower liner all cleaned up. I got ready for bed and updated this.

Tuesday 4/21, It was rainy when I got home so we didn’t take the dogs on a walk. Eric had done a bunch of yard work and I worked on the inside with getting my bathroom cleaned and washing windows. We went to Fred Meyer to return the strainer and pick up a few other things. I can’t remember what I did for the evening but I’m sure it involved cleaning.

Monday 4/20, I got home just as Bruce was unloading the dogs so we chatted in the front yard for a few minutes before going inside with the dogs. Eric took everyone outside and Bruce and I talked. After he left we took four of them on a walk. It was a gorgeous day. When we got home we went in the backyard and I cleaned up back there then inside where we fed the dogs and I started cleaning my bathroom. Dinner was ready so I went out in the living room with Eric and watched some Family Feud. After dinner I finished the bathroom and did some doors and windows. I sat down and updated this and watched tv.

Sunday 4/19, We had to get up super early for how late we went to bed. Aubrie was taking me to the airport. We were up at 6 and arrived at the airport by 6:40. I said bye to Aubs and since I was flying first class again I cruised through check-in and security. I got a yogurt and waited at the gate. We boarded and I mostly read my book. They served breakfast and we landed 30 minutes early at 10:30. Eric picked me up and when we got home I climbed into bed and fell asleep after we talked for a little bit. I woke up at 2:00 and felt out of it so I showered and got dressed. It was a gorgeous day. We went to Fred Meyer for groceries and a shower squeegee. Back at home I was still tired but went out in the backyard for a while to see which dahlias have come up. Dinner was ready and we watched tv in the living room. I fell asleep at 8:30, woke up for Last Man Alive, then fell back asleep by 10:30.

Saturday 4/18, We were up at 8 so that we could be up north to meet Courtney by 9:00. Aubrie and Christian dropped me off at Snooze and it was the whole Sully fam. I gave Abby Lynne her presents and they kept her occupied for the meal. We did catch ups about the whole Alishia / Kassie thing and they filled me in on their goings on. We had a very nice breakfast then packed up. Pat had to leave for a cooking thing so Court, AL, and I went to sit by the fountain and wait for Aubrie to pick me up. I said goodbye to Court then we were on our way north to Alishia’s to meet up with everyone. We got ready, hung out, talked with Mom and Dad, the boys took off to run errands, then Aubrie and I went to get a card for Alishia. When we got back she was upset that Kass hadn’t come but we talked her off the ledge and ran out to pick up Pete so he could drive up with Alishia. They took off, we ate some lunch, and we left about a half hour later. It was over an hour and a half drive up to the University of Redlands. Mindy was  along for the drive so we had a lot to talk about. Aubrie and I did some coloring in my Ryan Gosling coloring book. When we arrived the parking was a mess, but we found a spot and headed out for the graduation ceremony. We waited and saw her walk by before going into the stadium. It was kind of a long ceremony and the sun was so strong, but it was a gorgeous day. After it was over we took a few pictures then hightailed it out of there to make an 8:00 dinner reservation at a winery called South something Winery. We got there right on time and we had the private room. Dinner was excellent and I got a ginormous pork chop. We all shared a bunch of desserts. Conversation was great and we did a lot of laughing. By the time we got out of there it was after 10 I think. I had to drive because everyone else was drunk. Back at Alishia’s we took off for Aubrie’s. By the time we got back to her place and after finishing talking we got to bed right around 1:00.

Friday 4/17, I was in and out of sleep all morning and right when I started to actually wake up Aubrie texted me to see if I was up (9:15). We talked and talked in the living room and a little after 10 finally got ready and went out to get smoothies for breakfast. I got a blueberry one that was delicious. We gathered up our stuff and headed north to meet Alishia for lunch at Kai’s. I handed off her rings and we headed inside. I got a Mediterranean omelet that was very tasty. After lunch we went into downtown Carlsbad to walk around. We went to Spin first and I got the newest Belle and Sebastian, Jenny Lewis, and Delta Spirit. Next we went to Chocolate Bar where I got a chocolate covered peanut butter oreo and a chocolate covered peanut butter pretzel nugget. We went to Alishia’s to get ready for an early dinner and Pete was home. We hung out there for a little bit, talking about Alishia’s book collection and the new baby’s room, then took off for dinner at Ignite. The food was good and the outdoor seating area was so nice. Mom and Dad brought Christian up with them so we had the whole fam there. It was a fun dinner and we were out of there by 7 maybe? Aubs, Christian, and I headed back down to their place and did a whole night of talking again. We went to bed around midnight.

Thursday 4/16, When I got home I took a shower and finished packing my bag. Eric made me some dinner and soon we were off to the airport for my flight to San Diego. I had been upgraded to first so I knew I wouldn’t need as much time to get through security, and as I suspected it didn’t take long at all. I got a cookie and headed to my gate. The flight departed on time and I re-started The Marriage Plot. They made cookies and the white chocolate / cranberry ones were my favorite. We landed a little ahead of schedule (at 11:30) and I met Aubrie and Christian out at the curb. We talked all the way back to her house then continued our conversation until 1:30 am. We talked about all sorts of stuff and finally forced ourselves to shut up and go to bed. I slept in the living room on an air mattress and it wasn’t too bad.

Wednesday 4/15, I went over to Susan’s after work and we watched two episodes, one that had hardly any Mulder at all (but he did have on a wedding ring – very suspect) and the second was about a blind woman who can see murders happening. Mulder had a real affinity for that lady and she was just an idiot for ending up back in jail. I went home and Eric was making dinner: blackened chicken sandwiches that I gave a 10. We cleaned up the kitchen then I showered and got into bed. I updated this a bit then went to bed.

Tuesday 4/14, When I got home I worked out but didn’t really give it my all. Again. I started packing for my trip to San Diego in a few days then ate dinner and took a shower. I updated this and waited to hear from Kassie to pick up Alishia’s ring. Finally made it downtown by 9:30, chatted for a few minutes and got an update on Heen, then took off. I unwrapped the rings when I got home to take a look. I went to bed at almost midnight. Too late.

Monday 4/13, I got home and reluctantly did my workout but it felt like I really half-assed it. Eric made some pasta and I ate a lot. A bad combination considering my lack luster workout. I had plans to do a bunch of stuff around the house but was too lazy to do any of it. I watched DwtS in bed and fell asleep by 10:30.

Sunday 4/12, I slept until 8 and finally got up. Eric made little mcmuffins for breakfast that really hit the spot. I got back in bed and did some X-Files reading and filing of my emails then fell back asleep until after 11. I made myself get up and do some chores. Started with laundry then cleaned up my bathroom and figured out that the guy that serviced the hot water heater turned it all the way down to “Warm”. No wonder I haven’t had a hot shower since 2014! Geez. I cranked it up and that did the trick.  It was our 7-year anniversary so we wanted to do something in the afternoon after Poppy went home but I didn’t hear from Mary about their pick up schedule until almost 5. Nuts. I napped for a little bit until they said they were on their way. I went out in the backyard for 15 minutes and trimmed up some hellebores. They arrived to pick up Pop which was fine. Back to three dogs. We decided to go up to Cloud 9 burgers for dinner and it was very sweet. We had a simple anniversary and did a quick lap around the complex to see what it had to offer. Not much. We went to DQ for a blizzard treat and to check out the talent. We went there on our first date and reminisced. Back at home we relaxed until Last Man on Earth came on. It was a good set of episodes. Went to bed around the normal time.

Saturday 4/11, We were up early and took Clancy down to the discount vet in Kirkland for his DHPP and rabies shots. We were out of there by 8:20 and back home. I texted Susan that I was ready for her to come over for X-Files anytime. I did chores around the house until she arrived and then we sat down and talked and talked. We did manage to get in two episodes which were a mythology set. Susan left a little while later and I did a few more things around the house. We headed up to the GO then to QFC. Sky and Chrystol were coming over for dinner so we cleaned up the house a little. I called Mom and talked to both her and Dad. Dad filled me in on his appointment in LA with the specialist. He’s overwhelmed and not sure which course of treatment to take. Sky and Chrystol arrived and we were all so hungry we ate half our meal in the kitchen then moved out to the dining room. For dessert we moved to the living room and watched some tv. They left by 11 and I watched the first part of SNL before falling asleep.

Friday 4/10, I got home early since I went in early and had a big work meeting that included lunch. I showered and hung out and when Eric got home we got the dogs all squared away and ready for Jojo to go home. She was picked up and Eric made quesadillas using a bunch of veggies and the ricotta. I went to Nordstrom Rack and got a couple shirts. I was there until after 9:00 then home. I was tired so I went to bed early.

Thursday 4/9, We did a dog walk when I got home and I also did my workout for 35 minutes. Eric made a delicious salad for dinner consisting of baby broccoli, garbanzo beans, and ricotta, all seasoned with shallots, garlic, lemon, and red pepper flakes. I felt really full when I was done. I fell asleep at 9:30.

Wednesday 4/8, We took the dogs on a walk again and that went well. I skipped working out and instead changed my sheets and waited for dinner to be ready. We watched some tv then I showered and got into bed and updated this. All the dogs joined me. Nothing acts like a dog-magnet like clean bedding. Watched tv and went to bed kind of late.

Tuesday 4/7, When I got home we took a walk with the dogs, including Pop who arrived that morning. When we got home I worked out for 35 minutes then Eric made me dinner. I showered and got into bed and ended up falling asleep at 8:30. Eric took care of the dogs and turned everything off for me.

Monday 4/6, Long day at work. Jojo arrived. Eric and I took Jojo, Nyx, and Clancy for a walk and I vented about my day. At home I cleaned up the backyard then talked with Eric in the kitchen while he made dinner. I went into the bedroom and took care of some dog stuff. Eric brought in dinner and it was delicious and simple. I showered then climbed into bed to relax, watch DwtS, and update this.

Sunday 4/5, We kind of slept in and took our time getting out of bed. We showered and packed up, then took off to get some breakfast. We ended up just going to Whole Foods and getting smoothies and took off for Evergreen, via Morrison. We drove up the mountain and enjoyed the scenery and little towns on the way. When we got to Evergreen we walked around a little then decided to head out to Idaho Springs. The town was very quaint but everything was closed (Easter). They had a little radio station, called The Goat or something, which we tuned into for two songs, one was Grateful Dead. We headed back into town and on the way saw the Sleeper House on Genesee mountain. We found a Mexican restaurant for lunch then wanted to kill some time before heading to the airport. We went to Nordstrom Rack but they were closed. What?! I texted the sisters and Aubrie texted back “Jesus has risen and closed Nordstrom”. We gassed up and just headed to the airport. We were there super early but got everything squared away and hung at the gate. Our flight was scheduled to get into Seattle early but before we left the gate a woman started having an asthma attack so they took her off which delayed our early departure. Eric did okay on the flight and kind of just zoned out. When we landed, we got the luggage, car, to the store for groceries, and home in less than an hour. I love Alaska. We relaxed for the evening and the dogs were happy to see us.

Saturday 4/4, We were up a little after 7, got up and ready and headed into Denver to have breakfast with Alix and Cierra. We arrived at 9 and checked out their place which is very loft-y. We walked to the 16th Street Mall and went to a crepe place in the square where Sos had utilized a Starbucks bathroom the prior fall. Breakfast was good and we did a lot of chatting and discussing which ski resorts are the best. We walked back to their place and talked in their living room for a while. We left and started our adventure, setting our coordinates to Golden. We drove through town then parked and walked the main strip. We went to the bridge and I took a couple pictures then we headed back to the car and decided to drive up to the top of the Buffalo Bill mountain to see his grave. Mom ran up it when we lived in CO, in full makeup, tiara, and pageant sash. It’s five miles up and the air is thin. There were a lot of bicyclists out and it was a gorgeous day. We took our time driving up and when we made it to the top we took some pictures, went through the museum, and Eric got a local root beer. We decided to head back down and checked in with Sos to see if she was ready for us. We headed through Boulder and out of town to her parents’ house. We visited there for an hour plus, had cookies and played with the kiddos. Maia stayed behind while we went into Boulder to walk Pearl and have dinner. We checked out a consignment shop, several fun toy shops, candy shop, etc. We ate at an Italian place where we got a bunch of appetizers and everything was delicious. We did more walking and eventually went to a place to get drinks and have some kale chips and talk. For dinner we went to another place that was more of a bar and I got the mushroom macaroni and cheese. By the time we left it was nine or so and we were all totally stuffed. We headed back to the cars and said our goodbyes. We drove back to the hotel and got into bed and watched tv. I was out pretty quickly.

Friday 4/3, We both woke up early, like 7, which was actually 6 our time. Considering we didn’t go to bed until around 1 am, we were not happy about being awake. We decided to get going and tried to decide what we wanted to do since there was snow on the ground and it was going to be the coldest day of our trip (40s). We went downstairs and had breakfast then took off to find mid-century modern homes in the Hilltop and Cherry Creek neighborhoods. We were less lucky in Hilltop, but then hit the jackpot in Cherry Creek. We found one really cool house that would rival the Kaufman House, minus the landscape. We went to the 16th Street Mall and walked for a little bit, stopped in a couple stores, then back to the car. We went to Morrison and up to Red Rocks. We swung through the elementary school first, then up to the park. We walked up to the amphitheater and Eric took it all in. We walked up to the top and took some pictures and just looked around. We went into the museum but didn’t look too long before heading back to the car. The snow was melting quickly. We headed up to see about lunch at the Fort, but they only do dinner so we continued on to the old neighborhood of Willow Springs. There are a whole bunch of new houses lining the gulch which is sad because it was so pretty before. We went up to the house and the yard is so mature. I showed him all the houses with kids I used to babysit, where my friends lived, etc. We headed back down and decided to head into Littleton for lunch. We went to Lark Burger and it was very good. Eric wasn’t feeling well; residual anxiety from the flight, so we went back to the hotel. We rested and both got a little sleep. I talked to Sos and made plans for later that afternoon. We went to Target so Eric could get some pomade and I got a couple tank tops and gummy worms. Back to the hotel to relax for a little longer then we got ready and went to Sos’. We got to meet Wren and Maia was out in the backyard with the dogs. We sat and talked and I gave the girls their presents. Jake came home a little later and we all talked and discussed dinner. We went to a Polish place that usually has live music for Maia to dance to. Dinner was good but before long Maia wanted to head to the dancefloor. She made Eric sit down and watch then when it was my turn she wanted me to watch myself in the mirror while I thrust my pelvis. I declined. We took off for their place, Sos put Maia to bed and we said our goodbyes. We headed back to the hotel, I showered, and we got into bed. We were both exhausted.

Thursday 4/2, I was up early, packing, getting Pepper’s go-home stuff ready, and mentally preparing to go into Canada solo since Eric refused to go with me. I caught him having a few tender moments with Pepper before we left that morning, which was sweet. I took off right at 9:45 and made great time until I hit the border at Sumas. Because I was transporting I had to go inside and the border agent would not let me leave without producing a receipt for what was “paid” for Pepper. I tried to explain I don’t handle the money and I don’t have access to what was paid but it fell on deaf ears. I frantically called Sue - no answer, Janell – said she’d send out a blast to all NR-ers, Eric – forwarded me the contract after a tense dialogue where he told me he would hang up if I told him one more time to “just drag it to the inbox”. Luckily they accepted the contract but then told me I had to pay tax on her fee. I kept telling the woman that we are just a rescue. Finally she told me it was okay to go and not worry about it. I called Janell and took off out of there to meet the adopters at Starbucks. I found it, went inside to go to the bathroom, grabbed a yogurt for lunch, then back outside and they were waiting next to my car. K and I took Pep for a little potty then we exchanged everything and I said my goodbye. Off I went, made it through the US border much easier than the Canadian side, and made it home in record time. I had plenty of time so I took a shower and washed my hair, threw the rest of my stuff in my bag, and we left early because Eric was feeling anxious. I let him drive while I answered emails. We parked and shuttled over to the airport, checked in, made it through security quickly, and off to find food. I got a sandwich at Beechers and we headed to the gate. We were quite early so we had time to relax. A little girl sitting behind us tried to give Eric her band aid and we started cracking up. Then she wanted to show us all her “drawings” on her tablet, which were just animated pictures of animals. The flight was fine, though Eric was nervous and went into a meditative trance mode. When we landed it was late and snowing hard but I wasn’t too worried. Eric got my bag then we headed to the rental car place, grabbed a white Jetta, and headed off for Wheat Ridge to our hotel. It had been snowing for a while and was still snowing when we got on the road, but everything was fine since CO actually prepares for the snow and the roads were totally clear. We checked in and up to our room, which was very nice. We climbed into bed, watched tv for a few minutes, then off to sleep.

Wednesday 4/1, Eric was cleaning when I got home and I started in as well. Michelle was coming over but not until later. I made the bed in the back bedroom, vacuumed, shuffled laundry, and started to put together Pepper’s go-home packet. Michelle arrived and we talked until 7:30-ish. After she went home Eric made me a stuffed pepper. I watched a couple shows, talked to Alix, and took a shower. Eric and I talked about the next day then he went to bed. I went to sleep before 11.